2014: The Year in Psychic Fail

mzarathustra1It’s that time of year again: Time to review some of the psychic predictions made for last year.
Sylvia Browne is out of the picture now, but as Illuminutti has pointed out, she made one last set of predictions that turned out to be very wrong. How did the upstart psychics fare?

Nikki, “Psychic to the Stars”

I covered Nikki’s predictions two years ago (and I’m still waiting for Stallone to nab that Tony nomination). It seems her style has really evolved since then. Her predictions have become more specific and less cataclysmic in nature, making them more believable than “the map of the world will change” or “Earth will fall off its axis a little more”. However, she still has that peculiar habit of combining world-shattering events like food riots and massive earthquakes with events so mundane that you wonder why the spirit world would even bother to communicate them (the death of a royal horse, marriage for Oprah).

Nikki claims that a ton of her 2014 predictions came true, including health problems for Cher and Avril Lavigne, a “space tragedy”, and the deaths of four celebrities. This year, she has unpacked a whopping 290 predictions for the new year, not including a list of dozens of public figures who may die and/or have health issues. That’s a good strategy. If you throw enough shit at the wall, something has to stick, right?

Let’s take a closer look at Nikki’s listed predictions for 2014. Out of 45 celebrity predictions, three were accurate (“Mathew McConaughey nominated for an Oscar”, “12 Years a Slave winning numerous awards”, and Rob Ford’s appearance on Jimmy Kimmel). Four, if you’re very generous and include “Cher has to watch her health”. Cher is 68 years old. Everyone in their late 60s has to watch their health.
Most of the predictions on Nikki’s list were absurdly vague (“Danger around Justin Beiber”), and several were ludicrously safe bets (“A country music legend will pass”). Of the seven relationship breakups she predicted, not one actually happened. She predicted a “slight accident” for Tom Cruise and cautioned Johnny Depp to be careful around motorcycles, but said nothing about Bono’s bike mishap. Not even the predictions that seemed highly likely (“Miley Cyrus full body cast”) came to pass.

Nikki’s success rate for world events is even more dismal. The Egyptian pyramids were not sucked into a giant sinkhole, a gorilla did not devour its trainer, and the Empire State Building was not attacked by terrorists. The Coliseum Colosseum did not partially collapse, civil war did not break out in the U.S., and Mt. St. Helen’s Helens did not erupt. Her obsession with bird attacks didn’t pan out, either.

Birdemic_13

Maybe next year.

I predict that in 2015, Nikki will finally hire an editor.

T.B. Joshua

This year’s Top Fail award goes to T.B. Joshua, one of Nigeria’s most successful televangelists. His megachurch, The Synagogue, Church of All Nations (SCOAN), broadcasts his sermons to millions on its own channel, Emmanuel TV.
Joshua’s predictions merit special attention, because he presents them as information imparted to him directly from God – old school prophecy in action. Let’s examine just one of the many prophecies Joshua unveiled in 2014.

On March 8, a video made up of clips from Joshua’s July 28, 2013 sermon was posted to Emmanuel TV’s YouTube channel. During that sermon, Joshua asked his audience to pray for an Asian country to help avert an airplane crash that could happen there. He indicated the plane would have some kind of problem that could be detected while it was still on the ground. “I see a balloon,” he said.
If the plane crashed, almost 200 passengers would die.
Joshua explained that God had revealed the name of the Asian country to him, but he wouldn’t reveal it for fear of disrupting air travel to and from that nation.
The video then segues into clips of news stories about Malaysian Airlines Flight 370, the plane that had just vanished.

The March 8th video is impressive, I have to admit. Here’s a guy in Africa, predicting a major Asian air disaster more than six months before a Malaysian airplane goes missing in one of the weirdest unsolved incidents of modern aviation history. Sure, Joshua was a little skimpy on the details, but that’s a remarkably on-target prediction, right?

Maybe not so much. Another video, showing an unedited version of the same July 2013 sermon, tells a rather different story. In this clip. we hear Joshua clearly say that the plane will crash just metres from its takeoff point…a key detail that somehow didn’t make it into his official video.

God revealed the crash to Joshua, yet Joshua has (obviously) played no part in locating the plane. A full day after searchers started looking for it in the Indian Ocean, he suddenly suggested that very area as the site of the crash, and revealed for the first time that some sort of confrontation or hijacking involving “strange people” was the root cause of the tragedy. He confidentally asserted that wreckage would be found in the ocean within a week.

what

WHAT ABOUT THE BALLOON, THO?

Okay, so one of T.B. Joshua’s prophecies was a bit wonky. Let’s all give him the benefit of the doubt, and see how he did with other 2014 prophecies over at the blog T.B. Joshua Watch.

Terry and Linda Jamison, the world’s “most documented” psychics

The California-based Jamison twins revealed dozens of 2014-2015 predictions during an online radio broadcast (Beyond the Gate) aired on January 6, 2014. They called 2014 The Year of the Truth Revealed – lots of uncloseted skeletons and exposed corruption. They also explained that Light Beings are helping us form crystalline bodies, increasing our “manifestation potential”. So, uh, enjoy that.
They also accused Lady Gaga of stealing their costume designs from the ’80s and ’90s.

They offered some helpful career tips (computer skillz) and a few investment tips (oil, gas, biotech, and wellness).

On their website, they have a page devoted to predictions made on this show that came to pass in the latter half of 2014. However, after listening to the broadcast on YouTube, I have a hard time matching their predictions to any of the events listed on this page. They did make a few successful predictions on the show –  that Republicans would win the Senate, for instance – but I didn’t hear them talking about the specific events on the list. They just matched real-world events to the vague statements they made. For instance, their airy prediction about “breakthroughs in prostrate cancer” is matched to a vitamin D study, even though they didn’t give any such details on-air. This is classic retrofitting in action.

Bizarrely, though, they can’t even get their retrofitting quite right. They write that Nicole Kidman’s father died in the Philippines amidst rumours of pedophilia and participation in a “child murder ring”. In reality, Antony Kidman died in Singapore. He was not under investigation for anything at the time of his death, because the International Common Law Court of Justice mentioned in blog posts about him is not an actual legal entity. It is a loose collaboration of individuals with no background in justice or law enforcement, acting under “common law” principles in the same manner as Sovereign Citizens or Freemen-on-the-Land. The allegations of Satanic ritual abuse and sacrifice that have been brought to light by the “Court” are extremely dodgy. I don’t say that lightly. The man who started the Court and popularized the Ninth Circle Satanic pedophile/murder ring meme and is now the primary investigator of its supposed crimes is a personal friend; for years, I supported his work with the survivors of Canada’s residential school system. In recent years, however, he has shown signs of mental strain and gullibility, traveling the globe to collect evidence that he believes implicates the pope, the English royals, and influential politicians in everything from mass child abduction to cannibalism. The International Common Law Court of Justice he established has presented no concrete evidence to support any of these accusations. The sole source of information about the Ninth Circle consists of testimony from various alleged victims of the cult, and they haven’t presented any evidence, either. As the stories spread via videos and blog posts, more and more people embrace them uncritically without asking for one iota of proof, just as the Jamison sisters have done. It is a disappointing and alarming trend.

Other “predictions” were flat-out wrong. “Homeopathy will be helpful” in the treatment of depression? Sorry, ladies: Sugar and salt and water won’t cure anything.

homeopathy one weird trick

Sidney Friedman

U.S. mentalist Friedman’s predictions are, by far, the most entertaining of 2014.

  • “Garlic is in the news.”
  • “Chivalry returns.”
  • “A shock wave, perhaps literally or perhaps figuratively, is felt in Russia.”
  • “Remarkably, for the first time, a poll finally finds one person who actually approves of Congress.”
ouija-lunch-box

I predict bologna sandwiches today.

LaMont Hamilton

Not one of pyschic LaMont Hamilton’s predictions for 2014 came to fruition, largely because they’re silly. He predicted scientists would find that diseases can be spread by our thoughts, that a mirror universe would be discovered, and that a former U.S. President or First Lady would die. He accurately predicted the Bitcoin crash, but attributed it to a faulty algorithm rather than plain old human greed. He also predicted that “nano-chemicals” would produce cars that don’t need to be washed as often as regular cars. His less-silly predictions crashed and burned, too:

  • An electrical fire at the NSA’s new Utah data center will be linked to sabotage. Nope.
  • The Nobel Prize in Chemistry will go to Alivisatos, Seeman, and Mirkin for their work on DNA nanotechnology.
    Nope. It went to these fellows for their work on super-resolved fluorescence microscopy.
  • At least 2-3 Congresspeople will resign their offices before the Fall elections.
    “At least” is a clever little qualifier that can save almost any dumb prediction from certain death. Clearly, though, Mr. Hamilton doesn’t pay much attention to how many resignations we see in an average Congress. The numbers are always higher than this.
  • The original 1969 USA moon landing site will be reported as damaged or vandalized by another country that lands on the moon.
    Nope. And c’mon, this is just goofy. No one was even planning a moon landing for last year.

Better luck next year, ladies and gentlemen.

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2012 Prediction Fail

invincible


The Winner

ibringyoulove

The biggest fail is the late Terence McKenna’s Timewave Zero prediction. First published in 1975, it was predicated on McKenna’s complex novelty theory about the cyclical nature of time, and guesstimated that some kind of awesome singularity would occur in December 2012 (the date was based partly on his own calculations and partly on the Mayan calendar). Just how the arcane ramblings of a chemognostic savante ended up on Discovery Channel specials and in Britney Spears videos is beyond me, but the bottom line is: Nothing happened. No singularity. So let’s move on to that dagger-nailed doyenne of prophetic fail…

Sylvia Browne

Browne played it safe last year by making many of her 2012 forecasts hilariously vague. She asked us to “be mindful of trucks”, said she’s “still worried about trains”, and spoke of “airline difficulties” in several states. Which basically amounts to

look-both-ways

She has stayed away from celebrity predictions altogether lately, since her 2009 prophecy about Clint Eastwood’s varicose veins failed to impress.
Her big prediction was that the economy, the job situation, and the housing market would all improve dramatically. Oh, and taxes would decrease. If by “dramatically”, she meant “somewhat”, then I guess this qualifies as a direct hit. Vagueness occasionally works in her favour.
When she was any more specific than that, she bombed. Here are a few of her biggest misses:

There will be a tsunami in Florida in the fall.
A cure for Multiple Sclerosis will be found.
Obama will not be reelected.

wutgif

I’ve skipped most of her weather-related predictions, because they’re basically just variations of “There will be weather”. Glue some fake fingernails on your copy of the Farmer’s Almanac to achieve the same effect.

A few of her predictions did nothing but betray her uneven grasp of the sciences:

Weather stays terribly erratic. We are in a polar tilt.
The hell is a “polar tilt”?
We have to be more cognizant about vaccinations or we are going to have more outbreaks of measles, polio and whooping cough. These vaccines do not cause autism.
You don’t have to be psychic to know this.

A ridiculously safe bet:

There will also be earthquakes in Japan, China and Europe.
There have been major quakes in Japan every year since 2003, and in China since 2008. And there are earthquakes somewhere in Europe pretty much every year.

orsonlikesit

A few of her predictions were just nonsensical:

We will pay more attention to causes for eliminating hunger and animal care.
“More attention” than what? No attention at all?
More people realize this is a new age of enlightenment.
Again with the “more” thing.
We are looking at a time when spirituality is on the upswing.
Dogmatic religions will see their member numbers decrease.

Those last two statements actually contradict each other. Historical trends indicate that in times of economic crisis, spirituality and dogmatic religions flourish. When things get better – as Browne was predicting they would – religious fervour tends to wane. So the chances of a spiritual revival and an economic upswing occurring simultaneously are actually quite slim. Play the odds, Sylvia, play the odds.

Patrick Geryl

Belgian author Patrick Geryl seems to be a cross between the poor man’s Velikovsky and Charles Manson. His website looks sort of sciency, but the core of Geryl’s predictions have nothing to do with science.
Geryl claims he uncovered long-lost prophecies of the ancients by deciphering parts of the Dresden Codex in his own special way.  He combined these prophecies with his own bullshit astronomical observations to come up with the following predictions:

Some kind of solar Armageddon event Geryl called the “killer flare” was supposed to happen on December 20.

Within a few hours, Earth would be surrounded by a plasma cloud with a magnetic field that would “deflect” the earth’s core, causing it to rotate. Since the rotation of the core and the movements of the earth’s crust would be in different directions, massive earthquakes and other upheavals would occur, culminating in something along the lines of

kaboom

Geryl and his handful of followers bunkered up and prepared for the endtimes, thinking they would have to repopulate the ravaged planet and rebuild civilization from scratch. Fortunately for Geryl, all he really has to do in 2013 is get a new domain name.

Ed Dames and other Remote Viewers

On the October 6-7, 2011 broadcast of the paranormal-themed radio show Coast to Coast AM, professional remote viewer Ed Dames predicted a 40% unemployment rate, the imposition of martial law, and mass detainment in FEMA camps within the next two years. He said he didn’t believe there would be a presidential election in 2012 as a result of all this.
Back when he started predicting the “Killshot” (yet another solar flare that was supposed to destroy Earth), Dames’ crack team of remote viewers “saw” a bombed-out stadium and “many thousands” of dead Americans in relation to some unspecified disaster that Dames thought might strike during the Superbowl or the 2012 Olympics. Keep in mind that this guy used to claim a 100% success rate for properly-conducted remote viewing.

In 2008, similar predictions were issued by a team of other military-trained remote viewers working on a project for the Farsight Institute. They were supposed to be remote-viewing climate changes, but instead “saw” a huge meteorite slamming into an ocean, causing tidal waves and volcanic explosions. This would happen by 2013, they said.

NO
For pure psychic lulziness, check out this About.com roundup of predictions from “leading” psychics, ranging from “gold disappoints” to “the Holy Grail will be found”. Here are a few of the highlights:

“Psychic to the Stars” Nikki

These are some of the flat-out weirdest predictions I have ever seen. Nikki seems to be predicting cataclysmic, earth-shattering events on the order of 2012 or Birdemic, but she also takes time out to let us know what will be on TV. Sure, most of us will die, but Ellen stays on the air! And Stallone gets a Tony! So it’s all gonna be okay.

thumbsupnotreally

I’ve tweaked Ms. Nikki’s predictions a little, because as written they look like drunk texts.

An earthquake will destroy most of Mexico City.
There will be a giant earthquake in California.
Animals and birds, wild and domestic, will attack people leading up to the end of 2012.
Someone will find giant prehistoric Sea Monsters under the sea.
There will be major UFO sightings all over the world. A spaceship might land.
North Korea will attack South Korea and Japan.
There will be an attack on the Vatican and the Pope.
Earth will fall off its axis a little more.
The Holy Grail will be found.
A plane crash will crash into the White House.
The map of the world will change because of catastrophic events happening in the world.
Ellen DeGeneres will join the army for one week.
Sylvester Stallone gets nominated for a Tony Award.
Madonna will break a leg.
There will be a National Hockey League for women.

Terry and Linda Jamison, The Psychic Twins

The Psychic Twins look kind of like the little girls from The Shining, all grown up and full of shit. They claim to be the world’s “most documented” psychics, with accurate predictions of 9/11 and the May 2000 stock market crash. So how did the creepy duo make out in 2012?

double

Double your fail!

Terrorist attacks are planned for New York, Washington, Boston, Texas and Florida, but most of them will be thwarted.
Economic growth; no recession; unemployment stays about the same.
Letting go a negative patterns; more acceptance of positive patterns and choices.
Earthquakes in Mexico, eastern and western China, and in Los Angeles in April.

Don’t be sad that the good predictions didn’t pan out. I’m sure the Grail, sea monsters, and “positive patterns” will turn up this year. And even if they don’t, there’s still lots of fun stuff in the future. I, for one, am looking forward to mocking the hell out of Mike “The Health Ranger” Adams’ 20 Dark Predictions for 2013, the Year of Oppression and Insanity, in 2014.

Wednesday Weirdness Roundup

2009 Predictions: Pass or Fail?

Here are a few of the most interesting predictions for ’09, from some of the most trusted sources in the field of professional prognostication. How well did they do?

The aliens will introduce themselves on television. FAIL. On the July 10, 2009 broadcast of Coast to Coast AM, psychic David Wilcock announced that his inside sources within the intelligence community had told him that the U.S. government would give FULL DISCLOSURE about the alien presence on earth during a two-hour, international TV event by the end of the year. The TV spot had already been reserved and everything. During the broadcast, actual humanoid aliens would be trotted out and introduced to us by the President. Maybe the show was cancelled because too many viewers believe the President is an alien. Or because it would have cut into Leno’s time slot.
You can read about some of Wilcock’s other hilariously wrong predictions here.

The aliens won’t land, but the New World Order baddies will make us think they’ve landed, using holograms and high-tech gadgetry. FAIL. Throughout 2008, this prediction was touted by Alex Jones, Connie Fogal of the Canadian Action Party, and just about every conspiranoid on the planet. This video featuring Dr. Carol Rosin “explains” it.
The Japanese sea-monster hologram was sometimes cited as an example of how convincing a bogus alien invasion could be. Please. It’s cool, but even if you were really-really stoned, would you honestly think that was a live sea monster? Srsly? Would you run into a hotel lobby screaming, “There’s a sea monster in the bay and it looks pissed! Run away!”? Or would you say to yourself, “That’s an even better hologram than the shark in Back to the Future III! I am truly blessed to live in such a technologically advanced society, where otaku twentysomethings can create these wondrous marvels for the delight of mankind. Now I think I’ll hit the buffet”?

The Great Swine Flu Plot of ’09. FAIL. As I wrote at Leaving Alex Jonestown, Jones laid out the steps whereby the Commie-Satanist-Eugenicist elite would use forced H1N1 inoculation to cause rioting, giving them an excuse to bundle us all into FEMA camps and eliminate 80-99% of the world’s population. This was supposed to begin happening in the fall of ’09. Do I even have to mention that instead of forced inoculation programs, most developed countries have major overstocks of H1N1 vaccine?
I didn’t think so.

The Web Bot Project “Global Coastal Event”. UNDETERMINED. According to the Web Bots, early 2009 was supposed to see a “Global Coastal Event” and a lot of other vague-ass stuff like “emotional intensity”.

Sylvia Browne’s Predictions. Here’s what the dagger-nailed doyenne of epic fail predicted for ’09:

– The economy will rebound around May. FAIL.
– The U.S. will discover even more oil and gas reserves and begin using its own resources. FAIL.
– Regulation of loans and stocks will increase. FAIL.
– More jobs with better benefits (better than what?) will appear mid-year. FAIL.

– Troops will begin coming home from Iraq en masse in December. FAIL.
– Tsunamis and earthquakes will occur in the Far East. PASS.
– Branjelina will probably break up towards the end of the year. PASS? FAIL? WHO CARES?
– Harrison Ford will have a health scare. FAIL.
– Clint Eastwood will have varicose veins. UNDETERMINED, and who cares?
– Robert Redford will be honored for an award-winning documentary. FAIL. Not only did Redford not direct or produce a documentary, he wasn’t honored much at all in ’09. In fact, Lions for Lambs made most critics and fans want to kick his ass. A better prediction would have been, “It’s finally going to suck to be Robert Redford this year.”
– Katie Couric will leave CBS Nightly News. FAIL.
– Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins will start a large alternative-energy organization. That sounds like a safe bet, but FAIL.
– In March, a large liner “will go aground, sending many people into the water”. FAIL.
– Two plane crashes near the East Coast in August and September. FAIL. And she didn’t see the Hudson crash in January. That’s an extra FAIL.
– Terrorist attack close to Paris in January. FAIL.
– Two attacks in India in February. FAIL.
– A Brinks trunk will be robbed in Vegas. FAIL. Try Florida.
– An uprising will occur in Oakland, California – something to do with a police officer and gang members. PASS. There were riots after the shooting of Oscar Grant III in January ’09.

 

Updates

  • David Wilcock, the possible reincarnation of Edgar Cayce who almost predicted a nuclear strike on the U.S. back in the ’90s, told the world that at least one member of a race of benevolent, humanoid aliens would be revealed by Obama himself on national television this year. So go ahead and fire up the TiVo, ’cause I’m sure this will happen within the next two weeks.
  • It’s not that I thought there was ever any factual information in the “testimony” of intrepid Satanist-fighter Debra Hunter Pitts, but I just read in Bill Fawcett’s fine compendium You Said What?: Lies and Propaganda Throughout History that the song “Layla” was probably inspired by the classic Persian tale of a man who lost his mind with love for Layla or Leyli, the woman he was forbidden to marry. He came to be known as “Majnun Layla”: “crazy for Layla”. Ms. Pitts claims she wrote it as a teenager, cleverly disguising a Satanic murder ballad as a love song.
  • Marc Zackheim, the psychologist married to Anthony Godby Johnson hoaxer Vicki Fraginals, passed away in November. In March of this year, he pled guilty to Medicaid fraud, having falsely billed over $100,000 to Indiana Medicaid.

Psychic Detectives Part IV: Other “Notables”

Part I: Intro
Part II: Dorothy Allison and Noreen Renier
Part III: Sylvia Browne, Psychic Clown

Arthur Price Roberts

Roberts was one of America’s first psychic detectives. Little is known about him, the main source of information being Frank Edwards’ book Strange People (Lyle Stuart, 1986). Edwards reports that Roberts remained illiterate throughout his life because he feared that learning would dilute his gifts, which he used to predict disasters and identify criminals in the ’30s.
In 1935, Roberts warned Milwaukee police: “Going to be lots of bombings – dynamitings! I see two banks blown up and perhaps the city hall. Going to blow up police stations. Then there’s going to be a big blowup south of the Menomonee river and it’ll be all over.” Edwards writes, “As Roberts was known for his predictions, extra precautions were taken. Eight days later the village hall was blasted to bits. Two people died and others were injured. The next day the dynamiters blew up two Milwaukee banks and two police stations. In spite of extra patrols, a sixth explosion took place. It was heard up to eight miles away. The garage where it had been centered was obliterated. Two young men, Hugh Rotkowski, and Paul Chovaonee, were inside when the fifty pounds of dynamite for their sixth bomb accidentally detonated.”
These bombings did occur, but Edwards got many of the details wrong. There is no indication that Milwaukee authorities were in any way prepared for the bombings, and the bombers were Isador “Idzi” Rutkowski and Paul “Shrimp” Chovenec. With information about Roberts being so scarce and unreliable, it would be foolish to declare the case an example of successful psychic detection. Likewise, Edwards’ descriptions of Roberts’ other cases are too vague for them to be identified and confirmed.

Chris Robinson

British psychic Chris Robinson, a former janitor, sees visions of future crimes and disasters in his dreams with 50% accuracy. He claims to have predicted several IRA attacks of the early ’90s, 9/11, Chernobyl, deaths in his family, etc. All are unconfirmed. You’d think that years ago he would have started recording his dreams and secreting his predictions in a secure location in front of witnesses, to be confirmed later. Somehow he just never got around to doing that. Futurist and paranormal enthusiast John Peterson’s Arlington Institute is attempting to do something similar with its online “Whether Map“, but it’s not operative yet. In the meantime, Robinson hopes that we’ll take his word for it all.

Robinson calls himself a dream detective, and couches his abilities in Christian terms (though not as strongly as Sylvia Browne does). However, Chris openly admits that his gifts really aren’t of much benefit to society yet. From his website: “At first I was accepted by Scotland Yard and other local police forces as being a credible source of information even though it was impossible most of the time to act in a meaningful way to prevent the crimes foreseen taking place. This proved to be very frustrating and after 10 years of the authorities monitoring and working with me there [sic] interest faded. The reason was that no academics in the UK or elsewhere seemed remotely interested in working with people like me on research into this subject.” I think it’s much simpler than that: Chris’s tips weren’t useful in preventing crime, and the tests he has undergone produced unimpressive results.

In 2001 Chris traveled to Arizona to be tested by University of Arizona professor Gary L. Schwartz, and produced what he considered decent results. But when Richard Wiseman and Dr Susan Blackmore tested him in controlled experiments, his performance was lackluster (and that’s being generous). Chris seems to believe he was a success despite the poor results, and blames his failures on skeptics. One has to wonder why he bothers subjecting himself to tests at all, since he summarily rejects all scientific psi testing that does not support his own conclusions. For instance, on his website he promotes “the girl with X-ray eyes“, who has also failed miserably at tests of her superpowers.

Allison DuBois

To be blunt, Allison DuBois is barely worth mentioning here. Her mediumistic experiences and her “internship” in the Homicide division of her local district attorney’s office in Pheonix have been the subject of her three books, Don’t Kiss Them Good-bye, Secrets of the Monarch, and the weirdly titled We Are Their Heaven (really? dead people have nothing better to do than watch us get on with our boring lives?), and Gary L. Schwartz vouches for her abilities as a psychic. She was the inspiration for the popular TV series Medium. But unlike Patricia Arquette’s character, DuBois admits her information usually doesn’t solve crimes. Some of the law enforcement agencies she claims to have worked with have declared she had no involvement with their cases, and others say she didn’t provide any useful information. It’s quite telling that Pheonix investigators never turn to her for help. Detective Alex Femenia denies she provided any useful information in one of her few claimed successes, the Baseline rapist case. Her insights into high-profile cases are less than astonishing (she told MSNBC she saw Natalee Holloway “near the water”, which is an outrageously safe bet when someone disappears on an island). In short, her image as a psychic soccer mom and a “criminal profiler” doesn’t seem earned.

Mary Ann Morgan

Morgan is a trim, middled-aged blonde best known for her involvement in the Laci Peterson case (the Petersons hired several psychics in an effort to find “the real killer”, including Noreen Renier and a pet psychic who interviewed the only living witness in the case – Laci’s dog).
On an installment of Psychic Detectives, she was credited with locating the body of Loretta Bowersock in the Arizona desert. Bowersock’s boyfriend, Taw Benderly, claimed that she vanished while they were passing through Pheonix en route to their home in California. There were some holes in his story, big enough to arouse suspicion, but his suicide took him out of the running as the prime suspect. The case remains officially unsolved.
Moore was brought into the case by Loretta’s daughter, Terri. Though Terri gives some credit to several of the psychics she hired, including Morgan, her account of the case makes it clear that psychic Tammy Holmes was actually the one who contributed most to the discovery of Loretta’s body. Holmes was in such close contact with the spirit of Ms. Bowersock that she was able to tell Terri a little of what to expect in heaven: free purses.

Morgan also inserted herself into the Natalee Holloway case, accompanying Texus EquuSearch to Aruba. She pinpointed an area of ocean in which Natalee’s body had been dumped, and since her information dovetailed with the fact that a cage used by fisherman had been stolen around the time of Natalee’s disappearance, divers from EquuSearch and the University of Florida scoured the spot. Nothing was found. Dave Holloway says some of the information Morgan provided about the night his daughter died seemed accurate, but notes, “the jury is out until she finds my daughter.” (1)

Annette Martin

Once an opera singer, Martin promotes herself as a “medical intuitive”, a psychic detective, and a ghostbuster. As a detective, she runs a psychic detective agency called Closure4U. Sgt. Detective Richard Keaton of the Marin County Sheriff’s Department vouches for her help in solving cases, notably the disappearance of an elderly former paratrooper named Dennis Prado. On a map, she circled a small area of a park in which he was believed to be, and he was found within that area, but as in so many “psychic detective” cases her reading did not actually lead to the discovery of Prado’s body. Skeptic Joe Nickell pointed out to 48 Hours that Martin was able to draw lots of useful information from the police prior to drawing her circle.
As a medical intuitive, she channels the spirit of famed psychic healer Edgar Cayce.
Martin has had a long string of claimed successes over the past three decades, and has been involved with a few high-profile cases in California. Information on her cases is extremely sparse, and like Chris Robinson she doesn’t record any of her predictions for future confirmation. She claims she foresaw the death of John Denver in a plane crash 15 years before it happened, when he came to her for a reading, but has nothing to back up her story. She can’t even prove he consulted her.

Perhaps the strangest moment in Martin’s career: She became the first psychic to testify in a criminal trial when she testified for the defense in the Susan Polk murder trial. Polk, a deeply disturbed and delusional woman, was representing herself after her lawyer’s wife was brutally murdered by a neighbor boy. She accused him of doing the deed himself. She also insisted that there was a conspiracy among friends and neighbors to frame her for Dr. Polk’s murder; later, after her conviction, she admitted that she had stabbed him “in self-defense”.

Martin came into the picture because Polk was trying to convince the jury she was psychic, and that Felix routinely drugged and hypnotized her in order to obtain accurate forecasts of world events. In this way, he found out about 9/11 in advance and told Israel’s Mossad about it. You see, Susan insisted her husband was a Mossad agent even though he had no known connections to the intelligence agency, never worked in a government capacity, and had never even been to Israel. (I’ve written about some of Susan Polk’s other delusions and allegations here.)
Judge Laurel S. Brady called the psychic issue “tangentially relevant” to the case (2), but I think she was far too generous. Remember, Susan Polk was arguing that she had nothing whatsoever to do with her husband’s death, so his alleged hypnosis sessions didn’t have any bearing on Susan’s guilt or innocence.
Martin’s testimony consisted only of a rundown of her own work as a psychic detective; she was not allowed to weigh in on the reality of psychic phenomena. She said she had assisted in about 100 criminal cases and was successful in all of them, but didn’t provide any specifics.

One-Time Psychics

There have been numerous instances of non-psychics receiving flashes of insight that enable them to find a body, solve a murder, or locate a missing person. These cases are far more baffling than those of psychic detectives, because the non-psychics involved typically don’t continue to solve crimes after their experiences; they’re one-off events. The strangest such case occurred in 1980, when Los Angeles nurse Melanie Uribe went missing. A woman named Etta Smith told investigators she “sensed” Melanie’s body was in Lopez Canyon, but her information was ignored. So she went to the canyon on her own, and “felt” her way around until she discovered the body. Naturally, she was considered a suspect in the murder until three men were arrested and charged. In cases like this, it’s entirely possible that the person has gained information about a crime through normal means, such as gossip, acquaintance with the criminal(s) or someone close to the crime, etc., and simply doesn’t want to admit it. It’s also possible that once in a while, out of the blue, someone receives a message from a place or a time we don’t even know about yet.

Sources:

1. Dave Holloway, R. Stephanie Good, Larry Garrison. Aruba: The Tragic Untold Story of Natalee Holloway and Corruption in Paradise. Thomas Nelson Inc., 2006.
2. Carol Pogash. Seduced by Madness. Harper, 2007.
3. “Psychic Detectives” by Katharine Ramsland, at TruTV’s Crime Library

Sylvia Browne, Psychic Clown

Psychic Detectives Part III: Sylvia Browne
I’m willing to give Noreen Renier the benefit of the doubt when it comes to honesty. Maybe she simply isn’t as gifted as she thinks she is, and is sloppy when it comes to doing follow-ups.
But Sylvia Browne won’t be getting any such slack. She is a bald-faced liar and an utter fraud, the dagger-nailed embodiment of epic FAIL. I’ll admit that her whiskey-and-cigs voice and deadpan delivery are weirdly endearing. She’s like the lovably gruff white-trash aunt who sits in her trailer all day, knocking back black coffee while she waits for bingo. I’m not taken in by this, though. She can call people “honey” all she wants; this woman is evil.
Browne has been making her living as a psychic since the ’70s, offering phone readings for hundreds of dollars and establishing the Nirvana Foundation for Psychic Research (now defunct). In the ’90s she gained national fame as a regular guest on Montel Williams’ TV talk show, Montel. She made weekly appearances until the show’s cancellation in 2008. She steadily churns out books on reincarnation, heaven, psychic healing, and assorted New Agey topics.
Her son, Chris, claims to be psychic too. Psychic ability often runs in families, as with the mother-and-son team of Bertie and John Catchings and the family of “lesbian psychic to the stars” Terry Iacuzzo. There have been psychics in Browne’s family for the past three centuries. Don’t worry if your family lacks the clairvoyance gene, though: Browne’s Hypnosis Training Center offers classes on how to hypnotize your children and bring out their psychic abilities.
Much of Browne’s information about the afterlife comes from her spirit guide and co-author, Francine. No one knows just how Francine entered Browne’s life, because she has given conflicting accounts of their first meeting.
She is also in contact with many different kinds of angels, as well as fairies and humanoid aliens, but insists there are no demons (as we’ll see in a post about Ed and Lorraine Warren, other psychics vehemently disagree). After her psychical research outfit went bust, she founded a New Age/Christian church called the Society of Novus Spiritus.
In 1992, Browne and one of her many husbands, Kensil Dalzell Brown, pleaded no contest to several charges of investment fraud and grand larceny. They had been selling securities in a gold-mining venture under false pretenses, telling investors that their money would be used for operating costs when it actually went straight to their (now defunct) Nirvana Foundation for Psychic Research. Shades of Peter Hurkos.
Browne is cast firmly in the folksy New Age mold, but lately she’s venturing into conspiracy theories and pop eschatology to attract an even wider audience. Her latest book, Secret Societies, deals with staples of conspiranoia culture: the Knights Templar, Freemasons, Catholics, and the New World Order.

I first realized that Browne was full of it when I watched her give a past-life reading on Oprah. A woman in the audience wanted to know why she had a phobia of leaving beverages unattended for even a few minutes, and Browne casually informed her that she had been poisoned in her former life as an Egyptian “high priestess”. Then came the kicker: “I know because they poisoned me, too. I was the high priestess right before you were.” How amazing, then, that they would end up in the same Illinois TV studio on the very same day! I wonder why Browne didn’t pick her successor out of the audience right away to share some old times? “Hey, you, remember when we were both murdered in ancient Egypt? Wasn’t that da bomb? Whatcha been doing lately?”

If I listed all of Browne’s other false predictions, lies, and errors here, I’d have Carpal Tunnel before I was halfway done. So here are just a few of her “greatest misses”:
  • She solved the 1993 World Trade Center bombing. She actually was interviewed by the FBI, but the only suspect she could describe was “Salzeman”, perhaps a reference to Emad Salem or Mohammad Salameh (if you’re charitable). However, Salameh had been arrested 12 days prior to her interview.
  • Saddam Hussein wouldn’t live to see his trial.
  • She predicted 9/11. She didn’t, and the information she put on her website on 9/12 wasn’t accurate either; it contained names of organizations and weapons that don’t even exist.
  • Clinton was falsely accused in the Lewinsky scandal.
  • Bill Bradley would win the 2000 presidential election. He didn’t even make it past the primaries.
  • Bush would bring the troops home in 2007. Not one of the predictions she made in ’06 was accurate; she actually advised people to buy property because it would be going up in value. Her predictions for ’08 weren’t any better; she said the auto industry would improve thanks to the introduction of new hybrids. At least she was smart enough to avoid making any stock market predictions.
  • During one of several appearances on Larry King Live, Browne claimed to be working on numerous criminal cases, including one with Detective Stephen Xanthos of the Rumson, New Jersey, police department. She said she was getting ready to close the case. Xanthos turned out to be a former policeman and former P.I.
  • She cracked the case of a serial rapist in San Francisco in the ’80s. The extent of her participation was declaring the man’s last name began with S.

When Browne is questioned about a missing or deceased loved one, she reacts almost instantaneously to whatever information is provided, as though her mind and the Great Beyond are in a neverending teleconference. This can’t even be called cold reading; it’s just wild-ass guessing. A woman says she has lost her mother and Sylvia automatically offers a statement that can’t be refuted: “She was a beautiful woman.” If she’s wrong, is this woman going to admit on national television that her mother wasn’t beautiful? Probably not. It’s the safest possible statement Browne could utter. But sometimes this hairtrigger response doesn’t work in her favour, and those occasions are very enlightening. During a taping of Montel, a tearful young woman with a New York accent rose to tell Sylvia that her boyfriends’s body hadn’t been found. Quick as a flash, Browne told her, “That’s because he’s in water…you can’t find somebody in water”. The woman looked puzzled, and for good reason: Her boyfriend died in the World Trade Center on 9/11. How did Browne get out of this one? She didn’t. She continued to insist she could “see” the firefighter in water. “Is there any way he could have drowned? He says he couldn’t breathe and he was filled with water.” Finally she grasped at her last straw: Perhaps water from the fire hoses drowned him in the rubble.

Maybe this kind of mistake could be overlooked, if it hadn’t happened again and again on Montel (and elsewhere). Just a few examples:

  • The parents of a 17-year-old girl named Michelle asked Browne how she had died. “She was shot,” Browne replied without hesitation.
    The mother’s brow furrowed. “But…she just collapsed in her room.”
    Again, Browne simply refused to admit any margin for error. She said something had hit Michelle in the chest. Told that the autopsy had revealed no external injuries, she snapped, “I don’t care. Something hit her in the chest.” I suspect she lost a few fans that day.
  • In 2004 the mother of missing teenager Ryan Katcher was invited on Montel to consult Browne. 19-year-old Ryan vanished in 2000. A friend said he drove Ryan to his parents’ Oakwood, Illinois home after a party and helped him lay down on the living room sofa, but by morning he was gone. His truck was also missing. Browne listened to the whole account of his disappearance, then explained that Ryan aspirated some of his vomit. Panicked, two friends dumped his body in “a metal shaft of some kind”, somewhere across the state line (Linda Katcher had already told her they lived near a state border). A third friend took the truck.
    In 2006, Ryan’s truck was discovered at the bottom of Kickapoo State Park Pond. Apparently, he had driven himself to the area while still intoxicated and accidentally drove into the water. He drowned.
  • The mother of 12-year-old Weyman Robbins asked Browne how her son died. He had been found dead in the backyard of his home in 2002, a bandana around his neck. Though the death was suspicious, investigators declared it a suicide. Browne declared that he had accidentally asphyxiated while playing the “choking game” with three other boys, and the boys didn’t want to step forward.
    In the end, private investigators hired by Misty Robbins found the killer: Her own brother, who had been living with her for seven years.

If there’s anything worse than telling parents their child is dead, it’s offering false hope to people that their missing loved ones are alive. As mentioned in Part I,

  • On a 2001 Montel, the daughters of Lynda McClelland asked Sylvia what happened to her. Lynda disappeared from her home in Forest Hills, Pennsylvania in 2000, shortly after visiting with her daughter Amanda and Amanda’s husband, David. Browne instantly announced that Lynda was still alive, which sent Marcie into tears. Browne went on to say that Lynda had gone crazy, and was taken to Florida by a man with the initials M.J. She advised the young women to check all the mental health facilities in Orlando. Two years later, David Repaskey (Amanda’s husband) told an acquaintance that he had been having an affair with his mother-in-law. When she threatened to tell Amanda about it, he strangled her and stomped on her throat until she was dead. He and friend Donald Wall, who were both involved in a burglary ring, then buried Lynda on a hillside close to the home of David’s grandmother. She never had a chance to go to Florida.
  • As mentioned in Part I, Browne told the grandmother of missing 6-year-old Opal Jennings that Opal had been sold into white slavery and was still alive in a nonexistent place called “Kukouro or Kukoura”, Japan. One year later, Richard Lee Franks (a sex offender with no known ties to white slavery or Japan), was convicted of kidnapping Opal. Three years after that, the little girl’s body was found roughly 13 miles from her grandparents’ home. She had been murdered within hours of her abduction.
  • In 1995, 23-year-old Holly Krewson went missing from La Mesa, California. In 2002, Brown told Gwendolyn Krewson that her daughter was working as a stripper in Hollywood, California. In 2006, the body of a Jane Doe found near Descanso in 1996 was finally identified as Holly’s. Sadly, Gwendolyn had died three years earlier.

Knowing her track record, another of Browne’s Montel guesses seems almost as unconscionable as her location of missing people. A woman (incidentally, the same one who was told her mother was “beautiful”) asked Browne what her mother had been trying to tell her as she lay dying in hospital. “This is not easy to tell ya, but your father is not your father,” Browne said. She didn’t appear to find this difficult to say.

Despite all these disastrous errors, a few fans of Browne have tried to rehabilitate her public image by posting video clips of notable successes. In one instance, she supposedly helped a woman locate a ring owned by her late sister. She also guessed that Chandra Levy would be found in the park where she was last seen.

Browne’s biggest mistake, from a PR point of view, involved the disappearance of Shawn Hornbeck. The boy’s mother and stepdad, Pam and Craig Akers, turned to Sylvia Browne in their desperation. The 11-year-old had gone missing the previous year, en route to a friend’s house, and there were no clues to his disappearance. On a 2003 Montel, Browne solemnly informed the Akers that their son had been murdered by a Hispanic-looking man with dredlocks. His body was in a wooded area about 20 miles southwest of their Missouri home, near two boulders. When she heard this news, Pam Akers lowered her head and began to sob. She had always held out hope that her son was alive. “Hearing that was one of the hardest things we’ve ever had to hear,” Craig Akers said. Hornbeck was found three years later, living in the apartment of the man who abducted him. Michael J. Devlin is not Hispanic and never had dredlocks.
This miss attracted a huge amount media attention, and may have been more damaging to Browne’s image than any other colossal mistake of her career. Her days as a psychic detective are effectively over.
Still, she tried to save face. Asked by the producers of CNN’s 360 with Anderson Cooper to provide documentation that she had actually solved hundreds of cases, as she claims, Browne provided little more than two testimonial letters from people to whom she had given psychic readings over the phone. One was from Sharon James, a woman who paid $700 to ask for Browne’s help in finding her missing son in 2003. She was assured that the young man was living in Tennessee, suffering schizophrenia. Two years after James wrote the letter, her son reappeared. He had not lived in Tennessee at any time, and had no mental illnesses.

The second most damaging error of Browne’s career was made on the January 4-5, 2006 broadcast of the paranormal radio show Coast to Coast AM. Soon after rescuers reached the 13 men trapped in West Virginia’s Sago mine and it was reported that 12 of them were alive, Browne informed host George Noory that she had known all of the miners would be found. “That’s what I said,” Browne told Noory, without a hint of surprise in her voice.
Noory accepts his guests’ stories of alien abduction, time travel, and Bigfoot encounters, but even he couldn’t let Browne’s comments slide a short time later, when it was learned the reports had been in error: 12 men died, only one survived. He bluntly asked Browne to explain herself. Rather than give herself a graceful out by explaining that her powers are far from perfect, she actually tried to convince the listeners that she had correctly predicted the deaths. “I said they would be found. I didn’t say dead or alive.” Well, of course people trapped in a mine would be found. Who needs a psychic celebrity to tell them that?

How has Browne gotten away with this for so many years? For one thing, people are reluctant to criticize Browne because she cloaks her psychic ability in the language of religion, referring to it as a gift from God. Her publicist calls her a “spiritual teacher” and a humanitarian. It’s far easier to criticize a psychic detective who says “I find stuff” than it is to criticize one who says, “I was sent by God to help you.” Nonetheless, some brave souls have confronted Browne’s nonsense over the years. Robert Lancaster started the website Stop Sylvia Browne, which contains many negative testimonials from people who paid for Browne’s phone readings. James Randi urged her to take his Million Dollar Challenge to prove her psychic abilities (she initially agreed, then backed down with a long string of flimsy excuses).

As for law enforcement, conspiracy theorist Ted Gunderson (known for his outrageous and entirely insupportable statements about Satanic crime) is one of the only former law enforcement agents to provide a testimonial for Browne, calling her “probably one of the most accurate psychics in the country.”

Sadly, he could be right.

Y2K + 9

A Fun New Year’s Quiz!

Below are some gloom-&-doom predictions from some of my (least) favourite conspiranoids. You tell me if they’re referring to the aftermath of Y2k, or to what they think will happen in ’09. Answers are at the bottom. Bonus points for guessing the conspiranoid! Well, OK, no bonus points, but it’s still impressive.

1. “The resulting hysteria will reduce the masses to begging for a solution. The new centralized government will offer to restore order only after it imposes two primary conditions: the replacement of monetary systems with anelectronic chip implanted in every man, woman and child, and the worship of one God by all people.”

2. There will be one world government, asset redistribution, a new world currency, one-third of world’s shipping will stopped, and everything will be in a state of suspended animation. In short, total entropy.

3. Thanks to food shortages, mass famines greater than any in history will lead to the starvation deaths of hundreds of millions of people.

4. The present political leaders might “refuse to yield power.”

5. There will be martial law, a red sky, blue hats and black ski masks, economic collapse, Chinese and Russian submarines off both U.S. coasts, and nuclear events in U.S. cities.

1. Y2K. Bo Gritz.

2. 2009. Benjamin Fulford.

3. Trick question. Paul Erlich predicted this would occur in the ’70s and ’80s, in his book The Population Bomb.

4. Y2K. James Dobson.

5. 2009. Bill Deagle. He recommends you buy his First Line of Defense Kit, which is remarkably similar to the Y2K kits hawked by Alex Jones, Pat Robertson, and others.

The Week in B.S.

– Prophet Yahweh (Ramon Watkins) predicts yet another UFO landing sometime between Halloween and November 11. The aliens want to show their support for Obama. (Prophet Yahweh also claims he can summon UFOs by reciting passages from the Bible, so predictions seem moot.)

– I pay little mind to the pop music world, but this irked me: Beyonce Knowles tried to pass off one of her latest singles, “If I Were a Boy”, as her own work, co-written with German producer Toby Gad. She and Gad were the only ones credited when her new album’s track listing was released earlier this month. In reality, “If I Were a Boy” was written by Gad and a San Diego singer/songwriter named Britney Carlson (stage name BC Jean). Gad had Carlson’s permission to sell the rights to some of their songs, but she retained the final say. She reportedly declined to give the producers of Hannah Montana the rights to “If I Were a Boy” because they wanted to change some of the lyrics, and she also refused to give the rights to Beyonce’s manager/dad, Matthew Knowles. So Knowles and Gad went ahead with the deal anyway. Apparently the matter has been settled, but it’s entirely possible that Carlson will not be receiving any royalties from this hit single, because it was not recorded by her.

– Australian channeler/contactee Blossom Goodchild announced in August that the intergalactic Federation of Light would make its presence known through highly visible UFO sightings from October 14-17. It looks like the Federation members have mastered interstellar travel, but can’t quite comprehend Earth calendars. Or maybe they took a wrong turn at Albuquerque. At any rate, Goodchild’s lame excuses for them can be found on YouTube.
Goodchild’s announcement was a virtual clone of the failed UFO-landing prophesies of Marion Keech in 1956, Heaven’s Gate in 1975 (as chronicled in Jacques Vallee’s Messengers of Deception), and Richard Hoagland et. al. for December 7, 1998.

– As outlined in my post “Psychic Smackdown“, conspiranoia radio talkshow host Bill Deagle prophesied the European markets would utterly collapse on October 7, initiating a string of Illuminati-engineered events culminating in U.S. martial law, nuclear holocaust, and an Avian Flu pandemic. However, he nullified his 2007 warnings that cloned dinosaurs and Modified Attack Baboons from Texas would be patrolling “forbidden zones” in the U.S. when he prophesied that plain old troops with pepper spray will be guarding city perimeters. Dangit. I was so looking forward to seeing Modified Attack Baboons with nano-armor!
Benjamin Fulford made a similiar prediction for October 5, saying the economic “black hole” would become evident on that date, giving the Satanic Zionists their golden opportunity to inter us all in underground FEMA detention centers.

– On Kevin Barrett’s Truth Jihad Radio show (GCN) today, Webster Tarpley mentioned this clip as *evidence* that Obama really is a closeted Muslim. You see, in the conspiranoia world, accidental slips of the tongue simply never happen. I suspect there are at least a few conspiracy theorists who can’t bring themselves to call them Freudian slips, though, because Freud was Jewish and a psychiatrist.
Tarpley, by the way, insists Al Gore “invented climatology”, blames NATO for the kidnap/murder of Aldo Moro, and considers Putin the most intelligent and stabilizing leader in the world.

Psychic Smackdown!

Dr. Bill “Modified Attack Baboons” Deagle Vs. David Wilcock

It would be difficult to choose between these two modern-day prophets. Dr. Deagle is one of the Two Witnesses described in the Book of Revelation, but on the other hand, David Wilcock accurately forecast the Lewinsky scandal when he described his dreams about stuffed-animal orgies and Godzilla.

There have been some very interesting developments with Bill Deagle this month. If you’re not familiar with Dr. Deagle, you can read my summary of his colourful career here.

On October 5, Bill Ryan and Kerry Cassidy of Project Camelot were at the Nexus magazine conference in Australia (big shock) when they learned that Dr. Deagle had received the same info they had on a Big Event that would occur October 7th.

I’m not familiar with the origins and aims of Project Camelot, but I’ve watched enough of their online videos to know that Cassidy and Ryan interview only the nuttiest of the nutty, including:

– Boriska, a Russian teenager who draws pictures of his past life on Mars.
– Richard Hoagland, the Face on Mars fanatic who believes NASA revealed the ultimate truth about the history of our solar system and “hyperdimensional physics” through a series of 1950s View-Master slides.
– Dan Burisch, an alleged scientist who, with the help of his alien co-worker J-Rod, discovered the Ganesh Particle. This is the seed of life itself, and Burisch was the only microbiologist on Earth qualified to work with it. MJ-12 kindly gave him permission to leak info about his work through paranormal -themed radio talkshows and online forums, so we know that the aliens are actually descendants of humans sent back in time to fix some of the imminent disasters that already happened, by working with their own long-dead ancestors (Rogue astronauts? Richard Branson? The Army of the 12 Monkeys?).
– Duncan O’Finioan, who was inducted into a secret government program called Project Talent in the back room of a Kentucky hardware store when he was 6 years old. Talent turned kids into psychic supersoldiers capable of killing with the power of their minds; O’Finioan and others were used in Vietnam. He also has a bionic arm.
Benjamin Fulford, the former financial journalist whose dead great-grandfather helped him defeat an Illuminati plot to wipe out most of the Chinese population, with the aid of some Freemasonic Ninjas. More on him later.

Anyway, Deagle told Project Camelot about his most recent visions. Like the Old Testament prophets, Deagle retreats to the back of a cave in sackcloth and ashes to grieve for the future (figuratively speaking), and this time he experienced unparalleled pain and horror. He saw images of people bathed in a bluish light, holding their heads while screaming in terror and spinning around in confusion (Nutrimedical Report listeners, perhaps?), smelled burning flesh, and watched seemingly ordinary Chinese-Americans suddenly don military-style uniforms with strange crests on them. He saw martial law, a red sky, blue hats and black ski masks, economic collapse, Chinese and Russian submarines off both U.S. coasts, and nuclear events in U.S. cities which will be blamed on Al Qaeda. These visions aren’t much different from the information he offered in his truly insane Granada Forum lecture (available on Google Video), but this time Dr. Deagle received Spirit Knowledge about a specific date: October 7. That’s not the date when all of these things will occur, however; it’s just the date on which the “Luciferic forces” that will gradually usher in these events will be unleashed.

The U.S. bank bailout was a “Luciferic blood sacrifice” initiated by European countries. In one vision, Deagle saw elder members of the Saudi royal family demanding money from the bailout, owed to them as debt.

Deagle also described his visions of the Oklahoma City bombing, 9/11 (which he already knew about from inside sources), Katrina, and other events. In 1987 he had a vision of a mushroom cloud in the core of Chicago, and he believes this may relate to upcoming events.
At this point in the conversation, Kerry Cassidy told Deagle that she has been having similar premonitions, and assured him it’s OK if he doesn’t want to divulge the specific cities in which these nuclear strikes will occur (not that he had shown any indication of doing that). Deagle coyly admitted that he knows which cities will be hit, but named only L.A.

Deagle says he has premonitions on a daily basis, enough to fill an encyclopedia. He had horrible pain spasms right before 9/11, but this was 100 times worse. The events he foresees will produce massive fear on a global scale, and “transdimensional entities” will feed off this fear just like the creatures in Monsters Inc.

Yes, he actually likened his religious visions to the plot of a Pixar movie.

The events will unfold in a certain sequence:
1. On October 7th an economic collapse will occur in Europe, quickly spreading to the rest of the world.
2. False flag nuclear strikes will take place in major U.S. cities, probably within the next two years, ushering in martial law. The energy grid will be shut down. Between 200,000 and 2 million U.S. residents will die. Routes of escape from affected cities will be blocked off by perimeter guards armed with Directed Energy Weapons and pepper spray (apparently the dinosaurs and Modified Attack Baboons aren’t ready yet).
3. An Avian flu pandemic, combined with climate shift, will result in the starvation of 100 million people. Cloned food will then be introduced to weaken the remaining populace. (Kerry adds that she has heard the cloned food will come out of Mexico.)

Deagle explained that prophecies can be used to stall or even prevent certain events, because they offer the opportunity for prayer, grassroots political activism, and other forms of intercession. But in case none of that works, he offers some advice:

– Visit Nutrimedical.com and listen to The Nutrimedical Report for more information.
– If you live in a warm U.S. city located on a plain or in a valley, do not go east when escaping from it.
– Be properly prepared for pestilence and radiation burns.
– Remove all your money from the bank immediately. Convert it into gold and silver coin and food/water supplies.

It’s quite interesting to me that Deagle’s prophecies always involve things that have already happened. For instance, he wasn’t predicting an economic crisis last year. And he didn’t mention his Oklahoma City, 9/11, or tsunami foreknowledge until long after those events.

None of these new revelations would be in any way significant (they are, after all, the same old stuff Deagle has been peddling since his Prophecy Club days) were it not for a dissenting view voiced by one David Wilcock. I’d never heard of the dude. Turns out he’s a “lecturer/researcher” specializing in the evolution of consciousness, 2012 studies, “Ascension”, and ancient civilizations. He has been interviewed by – you guessed it – Project Camelot. His book The Reincarnation of Edgar Cayce? highlights the many similarities between himself and the Sleeping Prophet, and includes “documented NASA scientfic proof of interplanetary climate change” and how it “directly impacts our DNA.” He uses a Russian torsion generator for consciousness-raising and “profound healing”. He also has a theory that DNA spontaneously forms from non-organic material that spirals together in the emptiness of space. For more of this gobbledygook, visit his website (www.divinecosmos.com).

Wilcock is also a psychic. In July 1998 he issued a prophecy that a nuclear strike would occur in New York on August 17th. One of his visions included scenes from the recent Godzilla movie. Another consisted of “two vicious bears and two large, fuzzy stuffed-animal type creatures, all male and all having violent sex with each other in a straight line front to back.”

Needless to say, the nuclear strike didn’t happen. But Wilcock was “even more surprised when I discovered that Clinton’s testimony regarding the incident occurring with Miss Lewinsky would occur on August 17….Although the event itself was not a nuclear strike or an act of war, it had an effect on the psychology of everyone. It is this type of effect in consciousness that the [psychic] readings were most likely picking up on…I realized that Clinton’s testimony was forcing all the darkest spots in the collective human psyche out into the open.”

So, essentially, dreaming about a crappy Godzilla remake and X-rated Teddy Bears’ Picnics means that somewhere, a head of state may be enjoying a sexual encounter.

You have been warned.

Anyway, to get back to October 7th, Wilcock told Project Camelot in no uncertain terms that he believes Dr. Deagle is wrong. The ETs who watch over us would never allow such destruction, the elite wouldn’t want to destroy vast tracks of real estate, and if such things were about to happen Wilcock would have heard about it. He pointed out that psychic dreams can be symbolic, and may exaggerate future events. He was also unsettled by Deagle’s Granada Forum talk, saying it was akin to “death porn”. Deagle seemed to enjoy imparting terrible news. I noted this myself. Kerry Cassidy, however, disagreed.

Then Wilcock utterly discredited himself again by saying that his own intuitive information is highly reliable.

The consensus on various New Age/conspiracy forums appeared to be that Deagle is bats*** crazy, but there were still those out there who accepted at least some of his information as credible. A few people were plainly terrified by his predictions. Others felt, for some reason, that Wilcock is the more believable of the two and decided they will not be partaking in any Pestilence Preparedness.

Meanwhile, Benjamin Fulford issued his own dire predictions, adding a new anti-Semitic twist. He warned that if the American people don’t rise up and oust the financial oligarchs and the other members of the “secret inter-married clan of Satan worshippers” that controls the world (and suppresses cool anti-gravity devices), we’ll be heading into WWIII and a global “genocide” at the hands of Zionists and other evildoers. Not even the Freemasonic Ninjas can save us now. A financial “black hole” would become evident on October 5th.

Whatever your view of the U.S. bailout and our current economic crisis, I think we can all agree that October 5th and 7th were neither more nor less eventful in the scheme of things than any other days in the past several months. While there’s certainly nothing wrong with a bit of standard emergency preparedness, there isn’t a single solid reason to believe that the U.S. government will soon nuke its own cities just to bring in martial law and “cloned food”, nor that we will all be herded into vast underground bunkers by Satan-worshipping Zionists. I wouldn’t worry about Deagle’s Bioplasmatic Astral Entities or Modified Attack Baboons, either.

But watch out for those Teddy Bears.