2014: The Year in Psychic Fail

mzarathustra1It’s that time of year again: Time to review some of the psychic predictions made for last year.
Sylvia Browne is out of the picture now, but as Illuminutti has pointed out, she made one last set of predictions that turned out to be very wrong. How did the upstart psychics fare?

Nikki, “Psychic to the Stars”

I covered Nikki’s predictions two years ago (and I’m still waiting for Stallone to nab that Tony nomination). It seems her style has really evolved since then. Her predictions have become more specific and less cataclysmic in nature, making them more believable than “the map of the world will change” or “Earth will fall off its axis a little more”. However, she still has that peculiar habit of combining world-shattering events like food riots and massive earthquakes with events so mundane that you wonder why the spirit world would even bother to communicate them (the death of a royal horse, marriage for Oprah).

Nikki claims that a ton of her 2014 predictions came true, including health problems for Cher and Avril Lavigne, a “space tragedy”, and the deaths of four celebrities. This year, she has unpacked a whopping 290 predictions for the new year, not including a list of dozens of public figures who may die and/or have health issues. That’s a good strategy. If you throw enough shit at the wall, something has to stick, right?

Let’s take a closer look at Nikki’s listed predictions for 2014. Out of 45 celebrity predictions, three were accurate (“Mathew McConaughey nominated for an Oscar”, “12 Years a Slave winning numerous awards”, and Rob Ford’s appearance on Jimmy Kimmel). Four, if you’re very generous and include “Cher has to watch her health”. Cher is 68 years old. Everyone in their late 60s has to watch their health.
Most of the predictions on Nikki’s list were absurdly vague (“Danger around Justin Beiber”), and several were ludicrously safe bets (“A country music legend will pass”). Of the seven relationship breakups she predicted, not one actually happened. She predicted a “slight accident” for Tom Cruise and cautioned Johnny Depp to be careful around motorcycles, but said nothing about Bono’s bike mishap. Not even the predictions that seemed highly likely (“Miley Cyrus full body cast”) came to pass.

Nikki’s success rate for world events is even more dismal. The Egyptian pyramids were not sucked into a giant sinkhole, a gorilla did not devour its trainer, and the Empire State Building was not attacked by terrorists. The Coliseum Colosseum did not partially collapse, civil war did not break out in the U.S., and Mt. St. Helen’s Helens did not erupt. Her obsession with bird attacks didn’t pan out, either.

Birdemic_13

Maybe next year.

I predict that in 2015, Nikki will finally hire an editor.

T.B. Joshua

This year’s Top Fail award goes to T.B. Joshua, one of Nigeria’s most successful televangelists. His megachurch, The Synagogue, Church of All Nations (SCOAN), broadcasts his sermons to millions on its own channel, Emmanuel TV.
Joshua’s predictions merit special attention, because he presents them as information imparted to him directly from God – old school prophecy in action. Let’s examine just one of the many prophecies Joshua unveiled in 2014.

On March 8, a video made up of clips from Joshua’s July 28, 2013 sermon was posted to Emmanuel TV’s YouTube channel. During that sermon, Joshua asked his audience to pray for an Asian country to help avert an airplane crash that could happen there. He indicated the plane would have some kind of problem that could be detected while it was still on the ground. “I see a balloon,” he said.
If the plane crashed, almost 200 passengers would die.
Joshua explained that God had revealed the name of the Asian country to him, but he wouldn’t reveal it for fear of disrupting air travel to and from that nation.
The video then segues into clips of news stories about Malaysian Airlines Flight 370, the plane that had just vanished.

The March 8th video is impressive, I have to admit. Here’s a guy in Africa, predicting a major Asian air disaster more than six months before a Malaysian airplane goes missing in one of the weirdest unsolved incidents of modern aviation history. Sure, Joshua was a little skimpy on the details, but that’s a remarkably on-target prediction, right?

Maybe not so much. Another video, showing an unedited version of the same July 2013 sermon, tells a rather different story. In this clip. we hear Joshua clearly say that the plane will crash just metres from its takeoff point…a key detail that somehow didn’t make it into his official video.

God revealed the crash to Joshua, yet Joshua has (obviously) played no part in locating the plane. A full day after searchers started looking for it in the Indian Ocean, he suddenly suggested that very area as the site of the crash, and revealed for the first time that some sort of confrontation or hijacking involving “strange people” was the root cause of the tragedy. He confidentally asserted that wreckage would be found in the ocean within a week.

what

WHAT ABOUT THE BALLOON, THO?

Okay, so one of T.B. Joshua’s prophecies was a bit wonky. Let’s all give him the benefit of the doubt, and see how he did with other 2014 prophecies over at the blog T.B. Joshua Watch.

Terry and Linda Jamison, the world’s “most documented” psychics

The California-based Jamison twins revealed dozens of 2014-2015 predictions during an online radio broadcast (Beyond the Gate) aired on January 6, 2014. They called 2014 The Year of the Truth Revealed – lots of uncloseted skeletons and exposed corruption. They also explained that Light Beings are helping us form crystalline bodies, increasing our “manifestation potential”. So, uh, enjoy that.
They also accused Lady Gaga of stealing their costume designs from the ’80s and ’90s.

They offered some helpful career tips (computer skillz) and a few investment tips (oil, gas, biotech, and wellness).

On their website, they have a page devoted to predictions made on this show that came to pass in the latter half of 2014. However, after listening to the broadcast on YouTube, I have a hard time matching their predictions to any of the events listed on this page. They did make a few successful predictions on the show –  that Republicans would win the Senate, for instance – but I didn’t hear them talking about the specific events on the list. They just matched real-world events to the vague statements they made. For instance, their airy prediction about “breakthroughs in prostrate cancer” is matched to a vitamin D study, even though they didn’t give any such details on-air. This is classic retrofitting in action.

Bizarrely, though, they can’t even get their retrofitting quite right. They write that Nicole Kidman’s father died in the Philippines amidst rumours of pedophilia and participation in a “child murder ring”. In reality, Antony Kidman died in Singapore. He was not under investigation for anything at the time of his death, because the International Common Law Court of Justice mentioned in blog posts about him is not an actual legal entity. It is a loose collaboration of individuals with no background in justice or law enforcement, acting under “common law” principles in the same manner as Sovereign Citizens or Freemen-on-the-Land. The allegations of Satanic ritual abuse and sacrifice that have been brought to light by the “Court” are extremely dodgy. I don’t say that lightly. The man who started the Court and popularized the Ninth Circle Satanic pedophile/murder ring meme and is now the primary investigator of its supposed crimes is a personal friend; for years, I supported his work with the survivors of Canada’s residential school system. In recent years, however, he has shown signs of mental strain and gullibility, traveling the globe to collect evidence that he believes implicates the pope, the English royals, and influential politicians in everything from mass child abduction to cannibalism. The International Common Law Court of Justice he established has presented no concrete evidence to support any of these accusations. The sole source of information about the Ninth Circle consists of testimony from various alleged victims of the cult, and they haven’t presented any evidence, either. As the stories spread via videos and blog posts, more and more people embrace them uncritically without asking for one iota of proof, just as the Jamison sisters have done. It is a disappointing and alarming trend.

Other “predictions” were flat-out wrong. “Homeopathy will be helpful” in the treatment of depression? Sorry, ladies: Sugar and salt and water won’t cure anything.

homeopathy one weird trick

Sidney Friedman

U.S. mentalist Friedman’s predictions are, by far, the most entertaining of 2014.

  • “Garlic is in the news.”
  • “Chivalry returns.”
  • “A shock wave, perhaps literally or perhaps figuratively, is felt in Russia.”
  • “Remarkably, for the first time, a poll finally finds one person who actually approves of Congress.”
ouija-lunch-box

I predict bologna sandwiches today.

LaMont Hamilton

Not one of pyschic LaMont Hamilton’s predictions for 2014 came to fruition, largely because they’re silly. He predicted scientists would find that diseases can be spread by our thoughts, that a mirror universe would be discovered, and that a former U.S. President or First Lady would die. He accurately predicted the Bitcoin crash, but attributed it to a faulty algorithm rather than plain old human greed. He also predicted that “nano-chemicals” would produce cars that don’t need to be washed as often as regular cars. His less-silly predictions crashed and burned, too:

  • An electrical fire at the NSA’s new Utah data center will be linked to sabotage. Nope.
  • The Nobel Prize in Chemistry will go to Alivisatos, Seeman, and Mirkin for their work on DNA nanotechnology.
    Nope. It went to these fellows for their work on super-resolved fluorescence microscopy.
  • At least 2-3 Congresspeople will resign their offices before the Fall elections.
    “At least” is a clever little qualifier that can save almost any dumb prediction from certain death. Clearly, though, Mr. Hamilton doesn’t pay much attention to how many resignations we see in an average Congress. The numbers are always higher than this.
  • The original 1969 USA moon landing site will be reported as damaged or vandalized by another country that lands on the moon.
    Nope. And c’mon, this is just goofy. No one was even planning a moon landing for last year.

Better luck next year, ladies and gentlemen.

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Wednesday Weirdness Roundup: Ghost Sex, Celebrity Hauntings, and a Convenient Demon

This week, I’m going to labor the point that today’s celebrities just can’t seem to come up with anything original – even in the supernatural realm.

  • In 2011, Lady Gaga reportedly believed she was being followed around by the ghost of a dude named Ryan. A few months later, she told Harper’s Bazaar that the late fashion designer Alexander McQueen wrote her song “Born This Way” from beyond the grave (he had committed suicide the previous year). She might be the first celeb to have a ghost stalker, but she’s certainly not the first person to channel music from the dead. In the ’70s, an English senior by the name of Rosemary Brown released “new” works by major composers, including Bach, Mozart, and Beethoven. Weirdly, all of them spoke English.

 

  • Demi Lovato claims she has been followed around by the spirit of a little girl named Emily for most of her life. She told Ellen Degeneres she grew up in a “ridiculously haunted” house in Texas. Emily and her co-haunters like to screw around with electronics a little bit and make balloons float in the wrong direction. (Lovato also believes there might be mermaid aliens in the Indian Ocean, based mostly on an “extremely convincing documentary” she saw.)
    Even Ellen was unimpressed by the balloon story. And I’m unimpressed with the whole shebang, because it pales in comparison to the mother of all celebrity hauntings: Elke Sommer’s spooky-ass Beverly Hills house. In the mid- ’60s, Sommer and her husband, Joe Hyams, were hounded by poltergeist noises, ghostly dinner parties, and the spectre of a slovenly middle-aged man.
    While Lovato could produce nothing more than the unimpressive ghost photo you see below, Hyams became a less annoying version of the guy in Paranormal Activity, setting up microphones and even hiring a P.I. to monitor his house while he was away.

lovatoghost

 

  • Lee Ryan, a former member of some band I’ve never heard of,  says he grew up in Kent. But I think he grew up in the wilderness or something, because he didn’t recognize the ghost that visited him (via a psychic medium) when he was in his twenties. The spirit told him to work on his lower range and avoid drugs.
    Turns out it was Janis Joplin. Ryan took her advice about singing and abusing drugs, but may have forgotten to avoid abusing people.
    Michael Jackson did not grow up in the wilderness – though that might have been better for him – and immediately recognized Liberace when the ghost of the fabulous pianist began appearing to him with helpful career pointers. Jackson lined a secret room with mirrors so he could have a special place to commune with “Lee”. Then things got weird.
  • Ke$ha told Jimmy Kimmel that her hypnotherapist found a “ghost in her vagina” by waving a “ghost meter” over her body. She didn’t seem terribly concerned about this, and the whole thing may have been a publicity stunt. It’s not as disturbing as the fact that her mom dresses as a giant penis for her concerts.
    But then there’s B-movie actress Natasha Blasick. “I felt something entered the room. I couldn’t see anybody. Suddenly I could feel that somebody touching me,” she told the British TV show This Morning earlier this year. “Their hands were pushing me against my will and then I could feel the weight of their body on top of me but I couldn’t see anybody.” This sounded like a classic Old Hag encounter, until Blasick went on to say that when the experience occurred a second time she “decided to relax and it was really pleasurable, I really enjoyed it…You don’t see anybody but it’s very pleasant and it made me feel warm and fuzzy…It gave me comfort and support and love, and it did answer questions for me that there is something else out there.”
    Though the media had a field day with these crazy kids and their ghost sex, it’s all been done before. In the late 19th century, the much-persecuted sexual reformer Ida Craddock penned a series of works about her marriage to an angel/spirit she called Soph. For having the audacity to write about women and sex, Craddock was hounded to her death by Anthony Comstock.
    A few decades later, Englishwoman Dorothy Eady began receiving visitations from the spirit of Pharaoh Seti I, with whom she had been lovers in a previous lifetime. The two became lovers again, but Eady committed herself to a chaste life after becoming the unofficial guardian of the temple of Seti I in the ’50s. She took the name Omm Sety, meaning “mother of Seti”.
  • Now we move on to the dark side. Bob Cranmer is a former county commissioner in Pennsylvania. In 2003, he was charged with assaulting his 18-year-old son, punching him in the nose with such force that he was barely conscious by the time Cranmer’s 14-year-old son summoned the police. According to Cranmer’s younger son and wife, father and son had gotten into a quarrel over the bathroom. The charges were ultimately dropped.
    A decade later, Cranmer has a perfectly legitimate excuse for punching his son in the face: A haunted house. In his soon-to-be-released book The Demon of Brownsville Road, he explains that his Victorian home was possessed by a malevolent force that destroyed religious items, made a “blood-like” substance ooze from the walls, and wreaked emotional havoc on the entire family. He claims that his sons had to undergo psychological treatment to recover from the events of 2003-2006, and he has hinted that the demon infestation played a role in the family violence that erupted. What’s particularly odd about this demon is that the Cranmers had already been living in the house for 15 years when it became an “evil, evil entity” (to quote Cranmer).
    Sadly, this spirit-blaming business isn’t a new thing, either. When tomato farmer Maurice Theriault was charged with molesting his stepdaughter, professional ghostbusters Ed and Lorraine Warren tried to pin the blame on an incubus (even after Theriault admitted to his crime). Perhaps keep that in mind if you watch the latest blockbuster inspired by the Warrens’ legacy.

 

Will Sandy Hook Conspiranoia Go Mainstream?

totallylegit

As reported last week by Salon, relatively normal people like twentysomething New Yorker Brendan Hunt are now embracing alternative Sandy Hook theories. They’re harassing interviewing witnesses, searching for other gunmen, and trying to tie the tragedy to secret societies and/or the military-industrial complex in any way possible.
Hunt is by no means a self-proclaimed messiah like Jay Johnson or a Fregoli delusion sufferer like Ed Chiarini. He’s smart, well-spoken, and…well…ordinary. With guys like him promoting Sandy Hook conspiranoia, Salon writer Alex Seitz-Wald argues, even more ordinary people will be persuaded to believe there’s “something not right” about the Newtown massacre.
The thing is, though, that Brendan Hunt already bought into some dodgy conspiracy theories before discovering Sandy Hook (Kurt Cobain was murdered, Illuminati stuff). He’s not exactly cut out to be a Pied Piper, leading the unsuspecting masses off to Kooklandia.
But Salon does have a valid point. Even the fringiest conspiracy theories do have a tendency to leach insidiously into the mainstream, like sludge from some ancient, poisoned well seeping into the ground water.

Here’s how weird conspiracy theories often work:

  1. Something notable happens.
  2. The media reports it, authorities investigate it, people talk about it, etc.
  3. Wingnuts crawl out of every hole to explain what really happened.
  4. Over time, the alternative theories become normalized, and relatively sane people feel comfortable embracing them, even though they still don’t make much sense.

This happened with the assassination of JFK and 9/11. It started with a handful of kooks suggesting that the dyslexic, troubled Lee Harvey Oswald was a crack CIA assassin, or that Israel’s Mossad engineered an aerial assault on America. Gradually, the theories metastasized into an ever-expanding industry of self-published books, seminars, conventions, documentaries, even Hollywood films. In the case of 9/11, entire social movements comprised of energetic young people sprouted from ideas that should, by all the laws of reason, have remained confined to the hidey-holes of a few eccentric curmudgeons. Today, most Americans believe JFK was the target of a conspiracy, and a vast number of people think there’s “something not right” about the 9/11 attacks. It can get to the point where conspiracists are considered skeptics or truth seekers, while anyone who insists on basing their conclusions on evidence are seen as naive, dishonest, or part of the conspiracy.

A few celebrity endorsements never hurt. When a daffy prosecutor decided in the late ’60s that Kennedy had been taken out by some sort of far-right lavender mafia, comedian Mort Sahl volunteered his services as a researcher, and Johny Carson welcomed him onto his show to unreel a barely-baked theory about fake railroad bums who turned out to be actual railroad bums. Yale-educated director Oliver Stone had no trouble recruiting an all-star cast for an execrable film that was supposed to expose the Warren Commission as a fraud.
A whole slew of celebs have publicly expressed support for 9/11 Truth: Rosie O’Donnell, the Sheen clan, Mos Def, David Lynch, Mark Ruffalo, Woody Harrelson, Willie Nelson.

Now we have Sandy Hook. While the Aurora massacre and countless other mass murders have spawned popular conspiracy theories, it’s Sandy Hook that really seems to have captured the hearts and imaginations of the conspiracy world. Let’s take a look at how the Sandy Hook conspiracy theories played out, using the model above:

  1. Adam Lanza allegedly entered Sandy Hook Elementary School In Newtown, Connecticut and opened fire, killing 20 children and 6 adults before shooting himself in the head.
  2. The story drew international media attention. Investigators concluded that Lanza likely acted on his own. There was a worldwide outpouring of sympathy and support for the families of victims , as well as a national outcry from people who wished to see assault weapons strictly controlled or banned in the U.S.
  3. Ed Chiarini, a Texas conspiranoid who believes everyone he sees in the media is actually someone else (the last pope was actually Robert Blake, John Stossel is actually Freddy Mercury, etc.), declared that some of the Newtown parents he saw on the news were actually actors hired by the government. A man calling himself New Age Messiah (real name Jay Johnson) set up a website called Sandy Hook Hoax to explain how the New World Order faked the entire massacre. An insanely popular video (since scrubbed from the Internet for copyright infringement) explained how a map of Gotham briefly displayed in The Dark Knight Rises “predictively programmed” the Newtown massacre. World Net Daily feebly attempted to link Lanza to devil worship, and speculated about a Satanic-cult conspiracy. Alex Jones stated on his radio show that the Sandy Hook massacre could be a government-staged event designed to usher in gun confiscation and draconian legislation (which he does after pretty much every massacre). Veteran JFK researcher and 9/11 Truther James Fetzer decided “Isreali death squads” were probably responsible. YouTube users created novelty songs and “documentaries” accusing rescuers, grieving parents, and investigators of being complicit in a massive conspiracy/cover-up.
    Most disturbingly, many of these people insist the murdered children are still alive.
  4. Fragments of “evidence”, such as an Ed Chiarini visual aid “proving” that two Newtown parents who appeared on news broadcasts are actually paid actors from Florida, began to pop up on social networking sites, divorced from their wider (crazier) context. Seen in isolation, some of this “evidence” can seem quite intriguing and persuasive. As more and more average people are exposed to these free-floating factoids that have landed in the public square, many of them will be persuaded to believe there’s “something not right” about the Newtown massacre. And a new conspiracy industry may be born. There aren’t any celebrity endorsements so far (Dick Gregory must be otherwise engaged), but if we don’t get a Vincent Bugliosi to nip this thing in the bud, we could soon be watching a 12-part History Channel series on The Men Who Did Sandy Hook.

Correction: Spoke too soon about Dick Gregory. Here he is explaining what really happened.

Wednesday Weirdness Roundup: Wannabe Rappers

rap

  • I have seriously lost track of the number of YouTube vids and homemade documentaries that attempt to expose the supposed links between rap/hip-hop music and the Illuminati/Satanism. Run a YT search for “sold out to Illuminati” and you’ll see what I mean – there are even vids explaining how 2Pac was assassinated because he wasn’t souled out to The Man. Or the Satanists. Or whatever. Then we have a certain citizen who is so vigilant against Illuminati brainwashing in pop music that he can’t even identify himself, lest the Devil-worshipers decide to take him out for exposing their sinister use of, um, dolls and kittens.
    The basic premise of the Pop Illuminati theory is that in order to get anywhere near the top of the heap in the worlds of entertainment or sports, artists and athletes have to pledge abject devotion to the Illuminati, and/or literally sign their souls over to Satan. Talent, taining, luck, management, connections, good timing – that’s all bollocks. It’s really about what you’re willing to do for the Jews. I mean the Illuminati. Did I say Jews? Ha ha, no, that’s silly, the Pop Illuminati theory isn’t anti-Semitic. Not even a little bit.
    Until recently, the Pop Illuminati theory only affected merchandise sales (and not very much). But thanks to this overload of Illuminati hip-hop conspiranoia, we could soon be dealing with a bumper crop of deranged aspiring celebrities who honestly believe this shit. Take Wafeeq Sabir El-Amin, a wannabe rap star in Virginia (there’s your first mistake, kid) who allegedly crept up on a sleeping friend one night last December, aimed a gun at his head, and declared, “You are my sacrifice” before pulling the trigger. El-Amin’s victim was spared when the bullet ricocheted off his head, and he was able to escape by wrestling the gun away from El-Amin and shooting him in the stomach. Reportedly, El-Amin believed he had to make a human sacrifice to get in with the Illuminati. I’m guessing he didn’t make it. He’s currently in lock-up, awaiting trial.
  • You might remember Silibil ’N’ Brains, the hip-hop duo who briefly enjoyed C-list stardom in the UK with songs like “Tongue Kung Fu” back in ’04 and ’05. Their style was basically straight-up Eminem mixed with a little skaterboi punk, but the Cali dropouts had enough attitude to pull it off. After a single audition in London, they signed a a $350,000 record deal with Sony, scored a contract with one of the top managers in the UK, headlined a few minor festivals, toured with Eminem, and were introduced by MC Harvey on English MTV’s Brand Spanking New.
    It all fell apart when Brain (Gavin Bain) confessed that he and Silibil weren’t skatepunks from the Valley, after all, but college students from Dundee, Scotland. They had hidden their thick brogues and college educations after it became clear to them that a rap version of The Proclaimers just wouldn’t fly. Personally, I don’t see how this is much worse than Charlize Theron affecting an American accent even in roundtable discussions with other actors, but Bain’s confession instantly sped up the inevitable decay of  Silibil ’N’ Brains.
    Now, director Jeanie Finlay has released a documentary about them.
  • Sounds like a Canadian mockumentary, but isn’t: Hip Hop Eh.

2012 Prediction Fail

invincible


The Winner

ibringyoulove

The biggest fail is the late Terence McKenna’s Timewave Zero prediction. First published in 1975, it was predicated on McKenna’s complex novelty theory about the cyclical nature of time, and guesstimated that some kind of awesome singularity would occur in December 2012 (the date was based partly on his own calculations and partly on the Mayan calendar). Just how the arcane ramblings of a chemognostic savante ended up on Discovery Channel specials and in Britney Spears videos is beyond me, but the bottom line is: Nothing happened. No singularity. So let’s move on to that dagger-nailed doyenne of prophetic fail…

Sylvia Browne

Browne played it safe last year by making many of her 2012 forecasts hilariously vague. She asked us to “be mindful of trucks”, said she’s “still worried about trains”, and spoke of “airline difficulties” in several states. Which basically amounts to

look-both-ways

She has stayed away from celebrity predictions altogether lately, since her 2009 prophecy about Clint Eastwood’s varicose veins failed to impress.
Her big prediction was that the economy, the job situation, and the housing market would all improve dramatically. Oh, and taxes would decrease. If by “dramatically”, she meant “somewhat”, then I guess this qualifies as a direct hit. Vagueness occasionally works in her favour.
When she was any more specific than that, she bombed. Here are a few of her biggest misses:

There will be a tsunami in Florida in the fall.
A cure for Multiple Sclerosis will be found.
Obama will not be reelected.

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I’ve skipped most of her weather-related predictions, because they’re basically just variations of “There will be weather”. Glue some fake fingernails on your copy of the Farmer’s Almanac to achieve the same effect.

A few of her predictions did nothing but betray her uneven grasp of the sciences:

Weather stays terribly erratic. We are in a polar tilt.
The hell is a “polar tilt”?
We have to be more cognizant about vaccinations or we are going to have more outbreaks of measles, polio and whooping cough. These vaccines do not cause autism.
You don’t have to be psychic to know this.

A ridiculously safe bet:

There will also be earthquakes in Japan, China and Europe.
There have been major quakes in Japan every year since 2003, and in China since 2008. And there are earthquakes somewhere in Europe pretty much every year.

orsonlikesit

A few of her predictions were just nonsensical:

We will pay more attention to causes for eliminating hunger and animal care.
“More attention” than what? No attention at all?
More people realize this is a new age of enlightenment.
Again with the “more” thing.
We are looking at a time when spirituality is on the upswing.
Dogmatic religions will see their member numbers decrease.

Those last two statements actually contradict each other. Historical trends indicate that in times of economic crisis, spirituality and dogmatic religions flourish. When things get better – as Browne was predicting they would – religious fervour tends to wane. So the chances of a spiritual revival and an economic upswing occurring simultaneously are actually quite slim. Play the odds, Sylvia, play the odds.

Patrick Geryl

Belgian author Patrick Geryl seems to be a cross between the poor man’s Velikovsky and Charles Manson. His website looks sort of sciency, but the core of Geryl’s predictions have nothing to do with science.
Geryl claims he uncovered long-lost prophecies of the ancients by deciphering parts of the Dresden Codex in his own special way.  He combined these prophecies with his own bullshit astronomical observations to come up with the following predictions:

Some kind of solar Armageddon event Geryl called the “killer flare” was supposed to happen on December 20.

Within a few hours, Earth would be surrounded by a plasma cloud with a magnetic field that would “deflect” the earth’s core, causing it to rotate. Since the rotation of the core and the movements of the earth’s crust would be in different directions, massive earthquakes and other upheavals would occur, culminating in something along the lines of

kaboom

Geryl and his handful of followers bunkered up and prepared for the endtimes, thinking they would have to repopulate the ravaged planet and rebuild civilization from scratch. Fortunately for Geryl, all he really has to do in 2013 is get a new domain name.

Ed Dames and other Remote Viewers

On the October 6-7, 2011 broadcast of the paranormal-themed radio show Coast to Coast AM, professional remote viewer Ed Dames predicted a 40% unemployment rate, the imposition of martial law, and mass detainment in FEMA camps within the next two years. He said he didn’t believe there would be a presidential election in 2012 as a result of all this.
Back when he started predicting the “Killshot” (yet another solar flare that was supposed to destroy Earth), Dames’ crack team of remote viewers “saw” a bombed-out stadium and “many thousands” of dead Americans in relation to some unspecified disaster that Dames thought might strike during the Superbowl or the 2012 Olympics. Keep in mind that this guy used to claim a 100% success rate for properly-conducted remote viewing.

In 2008, similar predictions were issued by a team of other military-trained remote viewers working on a project for the Farsight Institute. They were supposed to be remote-viewing climate changes, but instead “saw” a huge meteorite slamming into an ocean, causing tidal waves and volcanic explosions. This would happen by 2013, they said.

NO
For pure psychic lulziness, check out this About.com roundup of predictions from “leading” psychics, ranging from “gold disappoints” to “the Holy Grail will be found”. Here are a few of the highlights:

“Psychic to the Stars” Nikki

These are some of the flat-out weirdest predictions I have ever seen. Nikki seems to be predicting cataclysmic, earth-shattering events on the order of 2012 or Birdemic, but she also takes time out to let us know what will be on TV. Sure, most of us will die, but Ellen stays on the air! And Stallone gets a Tony! So it’s all gonna be okay.

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I’ve tweaked Ms. Nikki’s predictions a little, because as written they look like drunk texts.

An earthquake will destroy most of Mexico City.
There will be a giant earthquake in California.
Animals and birds, wild and domestic, will attack people leading up to the end of 2012.
Someone will find giant prehistoric Sea Monsters under the sea.
There will be major UFO sightings all over the world. A spaceship might land.
North Korea will attack South Korea and Japan.
There will be an attack on the Vatican and the Pope.
Earth will fall off its axis a little more.
The Holy Grail will be found.
A plane crash will crash into the White House.
The map of the world will change because of catastrophic events happening in the world.
Ellen DeGeneres will join the army for one week.
Sylvester Stallone gets nominated for a Tony Award.
Madonna will break a leg.
There will be a National Hockey League for women.

Terry and Linda Jamison, The Psychic Twins

The Psychic Twins look kind of like the little girls from The Shining, all grown up and full of shit. They claim to be the world’s “most documented” psychics, with accurate predictions of 9/11 and the May 2000 stock market crash. So how did the creepy duo make out in 2012?

double

Double your fail!

Terrorist attacks are planned for New York, Washington, Boston, Texas and Florida, but most of them will be thwarted.
Economic growth; no recession; unemployment stays about the same.
Letting go a negative patterns; more acceptance of positive patterns and choices.
Earthquakes in Mexico, eastern and western China, and in Los Angeles in April.

Don’t be sad that the good predictions didn’t pan out. I’m sure the Grail, sea monsters, and “positive patterns” will turn up this year. And even if they don’t, there’s still lots of fun stuff in the future. I, for one, am looking forward to mocking the hell out of Mike “The Health Ranger” Adams’ 20 Dark Predictions for 2013, the Year of Oppression and Insanity, in 2014.

Wednesday Weirdness Roundup: Time Travel Photos, and Other Worthless Things

  • Irish filmmaker George Clarke has found a “time traveler” in 1928 film footage of the premiere of Charlie Chaplin’s The Circus. A woman in a fur coat approaches Grauman’s Chinese Theater with a cell phone clutched to her ear! Well, sort of. You can’t actually see what’s in her hand. At all. But in Clarke’s video, you can see a poster for one of Clarke’s films, as well as his production company logo. Hmm. (I have to wonder why any time traveler would carefully don era-appropriate clothing, yet yak on a future phone in a very public place right in front of a film crew. Also, how was she getting service?) (via Disclose TV)
  • Clarke’s cell phone lady is similar to the mohawk time traveler photo that circulated last month, and the “time-traveling hipster” from last spring. They’re more interesting than the photo of Jesus’ crucifixion, but not much more convincing when it comes to time travel. Unflattering haircuts and beards have existed for a long time, folks.
  • Octo-coverup: The untimely demise of Paul the psychic octopus may be more than it seems… Stew, anyone?
  • Over the years, there have been many weird hoaxes involving the collection of worthless objects for some worthy cause. Back in the ’30s, an 11-year-old Pennsylvania boy named Earl Baker saved up thousands of matchbox covers in the belief they would be used to procure an artificial leg, because a stranger had told him so. In this decade, hoaxes about raising money for wheelchairs, chemotherapy, and surgery by saving things like bottlecaps and potato-chip bags continue to circulate. (Messybeast.com has collected an astonishing number of these hoaxes, and Snopes has unearthed a few more.)
  • And the already-sad Randy Quaid arrest story gets even sadder, with Quaid and wife Evi claiming that a Hollywood assassination squad is gunning for them.

Conspiracy Monday: Review of Paul McCartney Really is Dead

Mockumentary, or documentary based on a hoax?

The other day I watched a peculiar documentary titled Paul McCartney Really Is Dead: The Last Testament of George Harrison, directed by Joel Gilbert.

Gilbert claims that on July 31, 2005, the office of Highway 61 Entertainment received a package with no return address, postmarked in London. It contained a mini cassette player and two mini cassettes. The tape cases were hand-labeled “The Last Testament of George Harrison”. Supposedly, George Harrison recorded his own “final confession” in December 1999, as he recovered in hospital from an attack by deranged intruder Michael Abram. Silver says his studio spent five years trying to verify the tapes’ authenticity, but three different “forensic tests” were inconclusive. Despite this setback, he assures us the documentary contains “startling new evidence” that could forever alter the history of rock and roll.
The film’s website offers no further information. We’re left to wonder why anyone possessing these recordings would ship them to an obscure production company, rather than a major daily or a TV network.

If you’re like me, you would expect Silver to describe the methods used to analyze the tapes, the efforts to trace the source of the tapes, and whatnot. But you’ll see nothing like that in this film. Instead, you get an hour and a half of an unconvincing George Harrison soundalike giving an alternative history of the Beatles that could easily be stitched together from decades-old conspiracy theories and anti-rock religious literature from the ’70s and ’80s. If you’re at all familiar with the Paul is Dead/”Faul” rumours, you’ve seen everything this documentary has to offer. The only “new” thing is the somewhat entertaining way in which the material has been crafted into a goofy, cloak-and-dagger narrative.

The tape begins with “George Harrison” describing the knife attack that landed him in hospital. “I don’t know why I was attacked,” he says, “But I have my suspicions.” He tells us that on December 1, 1980, Lennon phoned him to announce he was going public with the truth about Paul McCartney. A week later he was dead.
Two weeks before he was attacked, George said the same thing to “the man we know as Paul McCartney”.

George then gives us a capsule history of the Beatles, which is wholly unnecessary. A man giving his last confession isn’t going to waste precious breath recording the same information available in dozens of coffeetable books. “I remember the girls screaming and crying. It was so strange,” isn’t exactly a stunning new insight into the band’s early years.

The rest of the film details the conspiracy to cover up Paul McCartney’s death, and the clues scattered throughout the Beatles’ music. The basic story is already familiar to any Beatles fan, but here’s a short recap…

In September 1969, Drake University student Tim Harper published an article in the campus newspaper titled “Is Paul McCartney Dead?”. He pointed to clues in the Beatles’ lyrics, films, and album artwork indicating that Paul was no longer among the living. For instance, Paul dressed up as a walrus for Magical Mystery Tour, and the walrus is a symbol of death in the Soviet Union. (This particular clue has no validity at all. Yes, the walrus was Paul, but walruses don’t have any symbolic significance to Russians.)
Within a month, radio djs and college students had spread the theory so widely that WABC’s Ruby Yonge discussed it on-air on October 21st.
By the end of November, the rumours had gained so much steam that New York’s RKO broadcast a TV “trial”, in which illustrious attorney F. Lee Bailey examined the “evidence” presented by Michigan State student Fred LaBour.
The theory soon gained legs and teeth, evolving into a full-grown monster that may never be slain. Rumour had it that Paul had died in a car crash in ’66, or faked his death to escape from public life. But the remaining three Beatles didn’t want to disband, and losing their cutest member would definitely have put a dent in their popularity. So a Paul lookalike (“Faul”) was found and trained to play with the group. In some versions of the story, “Faul” was the winner of a lookalike contest sponsored by a teen magazine, and Paul didn’t give up music entirely; he joined Badfinger, one of the first acts signed by The Beatles’ label, Apple Records.
A November ’69 Life magazine interview with McCartney, in which he insisted he was the real Paul, maimed the rumour but didn’t kill it. If anything, the article fed the mystery and made some people more suspicious. It quoted Dr. Henry Truby of the University of Miami, who compared “Yesterday” to “Hey Jude” and declared them “suspiciously different.” Why would a major magazine devote its front page to the rumour if there wasn’t some meat to it?

The “final testament of George Harrison”, of course, describes the Paul-is-actually-dead scenario, borrowing heavily from the tabloid booklet Paul McCartney Dead: The Great Hoax:

On the rainy night of November 9, 1966, John and Paul bickered in the recording studio over whether to remain kitschy and radio-oriented (Paul) or to become more Dylanesque and message-oriented (John). Shortly before 5 AM, Paul stormed out of the studio and roared off in his white Austin Healey. About three miles from the studio, his car struck a lorry and flipped.
A “police officer” identifying himself only as Maxwell arrived at the studio about an hour later. He said he had been sent by MI5 to deal with a “sensitive matter”; a white Austin Healey had crashed, and a woman named Rita was insisting the dead driver was Paul McCartney.
Maxwell drove the Beatles to scene of the accident to identify the body. A young woman named Rita was sitting near the wrecked car, sobbing. She claimed Paul had offered her a lift. In her excitement, she screamed and threw her arms around him, causing him to crash into the lorry. Rita escaped unharmed before the car exploded, but Paul was decapitated (in the booklet, the unnamed female passenger is also killed, leading readers to wonder how anyone could know she caused the crash).
Though the head was horribly disfigured, it was unmistakably Paul’s. Maxwell made the macabre comment that he looked like a walrus. Sobbing, John pummeled Maxwell with his fists and cried , “No, I am the walrus! I am the walrus.”

(In reality, Paul and girlfriend Jane Asher were vacationing in Kenya and France November 6-19, 1966.)

Maxwell took the remaining three Beatles to an MI5 safehouse and told them the death of Paul McCartney would have to be kept a secret, to avoid a rash of girl suicides. A surgeon could alter another man’s face to resemble Paul’s, and the band could continue as before, using uncompleted material written by Paul to patch together new songs (John estimated they could do 50). Maxwell, who was apparently an MI5 agent rather than a police officer, swore them to secrecy on threat of death.

(Srsly? MI5 gives a flying fig about teenyboppers offing themselves?)

Two days later, as soon as they left the safehouse, the Beatles announced they would no longer be touring. It was arranged for Tiger Beat magazine to sponsor a Paul lookalike contest. No winner was announced, but a new Paul was found: William Campbell (we are shown a photo of a young man with a thick mustache and glasses, vaguely resembling McCartney). Campbell underwent extensive plastic surgery, music lessons, and speech therapy to transform him into “Faul”. The situation reminded John of a Stephen Crane novel, The Open Boat, in which three men seed clues to a fourth companion’s death throughout their poetry. John wanted to do the same thing, which would allow them to reveal the truth about Paul’s death without crossing MI5.

(“The Open Boat” is a short story, not a novel, and the protaganists do not write any poetry. Rather, one of them reflects on a poem while they drift in a boat. The story ends with the death of one of the men.)
There is no evidence that Tiger Beat – or anyone else – held a Paul lookalike contest. William Campbell is variously named William Shears Campbell, William Sheppard Campbell, and William Stuart Campbell. He is said to have been either an actor or a Canadian police officer employed by the Ontario Provincial Police, but no proof of his existence has ever surfaced. In some versions of the rumour, he had a girlfriend named Rita.)

Somehow, Faul was able to fool McCartney’s girlfriend, Jane Asher. But the Beatles forced Faul to break up with her, anyway, just in case.

In George’s opinion, John was too obvious with his clues. He wanted to title their next album Rubber Paul, one of his nicknames for Campbell. But most of the clues are too obscure to be noticed: Faul smoking a “coffin nail”, lyrics like “wiping the dirt from his hands as he walked from the grave”, Faul facing away from the others on the cover of Revolver, etc. Some clues dealt with Paul’s death, while others offered subtle hints that there was something different about Faul. Song titles said to be clues include “I’m Only Sleeping”, “I’m Looking Through You”, and “Act Naturally”. Some of these clues have been contradicted by the Beatles’ own statements over the years. For instance, Lennon said that “Dr. Robert”, supposedly Campbell’s plastic surgeon, was a reference to himself.
The cover of Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (SPLHCB) is a wealth of clues, of course. It’s a funeral scene, with Paul’s name spelled out in yellow flowers atop the grave. The photos are of people Paul would have wanted at his funeral, most of them dead; Stephen Crane holds his hand over Paul’s head in a priest-like fashion.

Then there are the backwards messages. According to George, Lennon coined the word “backmasking” and was the first to use it to hide messages in albums. “Getting Better” supposedly contains the message, “Paul is dead, he lost his hair, his head”, and “SPLHCB Reprieve” holds the obscure clue, “It was a fake mustache.”

The SPLHCB clues were so obvious, George tells us, that even Maxwell caught on. He warned the Beatles to watch their step. Instead, they jammed even more clues into Magical Mystery Tour. On the album cover, “Beatles” upside-down was the phone number of a funeral home, Faul’s walrus costume has a gaping hole in the chest to signify his lack of a soul, and the white figures on the back cover spell out RIP. “A Day in the Life” and “Lovely Rita” are major clues, though anyone who accepts the car crash story will have to wonder why the Beatles made such a sunny, flippant song about the woman who caused their friend’s death.
After more death threats and beatings from Maxwell’s goons, they prudently decided to leave their next album untitled with a blank white cover, but still left lots of clues in the songs.

Here’s where the film gets really funny. Lennon, with Yoko, flees to the U.S. and fakes insanity so that Maxwell will leave him alone. He has a bed-in, makes incoherent statements about peace and love, and just generally acts like a loon.
Meanwhile, Rita threatens to spill the beans unless Faul divorces Linda and marries her. She loses a leg in an accident shortly after making her demand, but this doesn’t stop her from resurfacing later as “Heather Mills”.

So Paul McCartney Really is Dead has its humorous moments. Overall, however, it’s a silly and mean-spirited mockumentary. All of the Beatles are portrayed in the worst possible light. Lennon’s activism is mocked. The real George repeatedly refers to McCartney as “Faul” in an interview. McCartney is a shallow, idiotic, untalented pothead. He’s shown responding to Lennon’s death in a cavalier way. “It’s a drag, isn’t it?” he says to a reporter, chomping gum. In the film’s closing clip, he tells an interviewer, “In that tragedy, there were some good things about it.”

The real story of the Beatles is a lot more complex. McCartney did feud with John and George, but this has a lot to do with Paul’s unwillingness to continue life as a Beatle. In 1970, he actually sued his bandmates to get out of the ten-year contract they signed in ’67.

The notion that post-’66 Paul was an imposter is absurd. Lennon himself lampooned the whole Paul is Dead craze in his ’71 song “How Do You Sleep?”: “Those freaks was right when they said you was dead”. The “clues” unearthed by college journalism majors, radio d.j.s, and fans are just inventive interpretations of ambiguous lyrics and imagery. And let’s face it: The Beatles offered up ambiguity in spades. That’s how folks like Charlie Manson could hear personal messages in every song.

Many of the Paul is Dead clues in Paul McCartney Really is Dead are easily debunked:

  • “Taxman” isn’t about the taxidermist who preserved Paul’s body, because taxidermists only preserve animal carcasses. Also, the song is clearly about a taxman.
  • Besides, Rubber Soul was released a full year prior to the car crash (I think the real George Harrison would have known this, though I wouldn’t bank on it).
  • Heather Mills was born in 1968, over a year after “Rita” caused Paul’s fatal crash. Her early life is well-documented.
  • The scar on Paul’s lip, supposedly caused by plastic surgery, was the result of a December 1965 moped accident.

Surprisingly, one iffy-sounded allegation turns out to be fact. John Lennon really did use some backwards vocals in the 1966 song “Rain”, the first known instance of deliberate backmasking. But this song was released in June, 1966.

Despite the dearth of solid evidence (or perhaps because of it), the Paul is Dead mystery still thrives on the Internets. The sites Officially Pronounced Dead? The Great Beatle Death Conspiracy and Is Paul Dead? are devoted exclusively to it. This site offers up facial comparisons of pre- and post-1966 Paul and concludes they were two different men. Dozens of YouTube videos pick over the clues. Even the Uncyclopedia covers the controversy in detail. Paul McCartney Really is Dead offers nothing new, is based on a pathetically transparent hoax, and is just generally a waste of everyone’s time.

Some Rather Pointless Hoaxes

  • No, Lindsay Lohan has not been poisoned. The search term “Lindsay Lohan Poisoned”, which popped up on Google Trends and elsewhere two days ago, is a publicity stunt by Alex Jones. He’s promoting an 11-minute video on the supposed dangers of ADHD medications, fluoridated water, vaccines, GMO food, etc. It’s amazing how many errors one person can cram into 11 minutes.
  • I’m not sure just how or why people fell for this one, but a few did: An email declared that on August 27th, a mysterious “second moon” would be visible in the night sky. NASA and umpteen science blogs were quick to set the record straight – the “moon” was Mars (which was nearly 200 million miles away). Weirdly – but to their credit – the Planet X people didn’t even try to capitalize on this.
  • Another peculiar email claims that for the first time in over 800 years, the month of August will have 5 Sundays, 5 Mondays, and 5 Tuesdays. This actually occurred just 6 years ago, and will happen again in the years 2021, 2027, and 2032.
  • There have been several shark sightings off the Massachusetts coast this swimming season, but at least one of them turned out to be completely bogus. Didn’t Bugs Bunny do this like 50 times?
  • Misleading internet headlines have given many people the impression that Buddy Valastro, star of The Learning Channel’s Cake Boss, was charged with sexually assualting a minor last week. In reality, Valastro’s brother-in-law was arrested and allegedly confessed to sexually assaulting a 14-year-old girl. As an employee of Carlo’s Bakery, he sometimes appeared on the show.
  • David Bowie has squashed rumours that he’s collaborating with Lady Gaga on a new single. The rumour popped up simultaneously on a glut of arts and entertainment outlets, many of which posted a *copy* of a document confirming that Bowie was doing co-production, guitar, vocals, and writing for Gaga’s next album. I’m not naming any suspects here, but I find it interesting that Gaga’s producer, RedOne, has been hyping this already-overhyped popstar even more than usual lately. He recently told Billboard her next album will be “shocking”, adding that it’s part of his job to “keep her evolving”. He has a lot of work to do if he wants her to evolve to the level of Bowie…

Wow, this must be more embarrassing than Piranha II


James Cameron – and a lot of other people – have been duped by a wannabe scientist and pseudo-historian.

One of the weekend guests on Coast to Coast AM was Dr. Charles Pellegrino.

If the name is familiar, you may have seen him in the Discovery Channel documentary The Lost Tomb of Jesus, or read the 2007 book about the tomb that he co-authored with “naked archeologistSimcha Jacobovici (who is neither naked nor an archeologist), The Jesus Family Tomb. Pellegrino, Jacobovici, and James Cameron are the three most enthusiastic supporters of the “Jesus tomb” discovered in Talpiot three decades ago. Cameron and Pellegrino have been buds for quite some time, because according to the Lost Tomb website, Pellegrino’s work was the inspiration for Titanic. Pellegrino introduced Jacobovici to Cameron, which led to their collaboration on the Discovery doc and a few other documentary projects.

Pellegrino might also be familiar from his solo nonfiction books: Unearthing Atlantis; The Ghosts of Titanic; and Return to Sodom and Gomhorra (to name a few). It should be fairly clear by now that he likes to explore somewhat spooky, fringy topics that most historians, Bible scholars, archeologists, and paleo-biologists won’t touch with a dead rat. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Unless, of course, you let the spookiness and fringiness hijack your common sense.

Pellegrino has also authored several sci-fi/ecological thrillers of the “Holy shit, we’re doomed!” variety.

You may also know Pellegrino for the subject of the C2C broadcast: His recently published book The Last Train from Hiroshima: The Survivors Look Back (Henry Holt & Co., 2010). It combines graphic descriptions of the atomic bomb’s aftermath with the stories of several Hiroshima survivors who fled to Nagasaki, only to suffer and survive the second bombing. It also features testimony from USAF officers involved in the bombing of Japan, including the late Joseph Fuoco’s harrowing account of a hushed-up atom bomb accident that killed one American and irradiated others, reducing the weapon’s destructive power by at least half.
The book came out earlier this year, but James Cameron has already acquired the film rights. And it has already been yanked from publication. Here’s the statement from Henry Holt posted on Amazon.com: “It is with deep regret that Henry Holt and Company announces that we will no longer print, correct or ship copies of Charles Pellegrino’s The Last Train from Hiroshima due to the discovery of a dishonest sources of information for the book.
It is easy to understand how even the most diligent author could be duped by a source, but we also understand that opens that book to very detailed scrutiny. The author of any work of non-fiction must stand behind its content. We must rely on our authors to answer questions that may arise as to the accuracy of their work and reliability of their sources. Unfortunately, Mr. Pellegrino was not able to answer the additional questions that have arisen about his book to our satisfaction.
Mr. Pellegrino has a long history in the publishing world, and we were very proud and honored to publish his history of such an important historical event. But without the confidence that we can stand behind the work in its entirety, we cannot continue to sell this product to our customers.”

So, um, what happened?

Well, first off, this is not the first time Pellegrino has gotten himself into a spot of trouble with the facts. In 2008, a Who’s Who of archeology signed a statement of protest against claims made by Pellegrino, Cameron, and Jacobovici. The three amigos had been crowing that an archaeological symposium on the “Jesus tomb”, held at Princeton in January of that year, was proof that their theory of the tomb was finally being taken seriously in scientific circles. The scientific community begged to differ. They also resented the fact that the media had bypassed their serious scholarship on the issue to quote a Hollywood director and a TV producer known for his sensationalistic statements.
When The Lost Tomb of Jesus and its companion book appeared, archaeologists reiterated their conclusion that the names inscribed on six of the ten ossuaries in the tomb weren’t proof of anything, except that six people bearing those remarkably common names had died in Palestine sometime in the first century. Some of the archaeologists interviewed for the doc and book retracted or qualified their statements. (Pellegrino’s and Jacobovici’s contention that the ridiculously bogus “James ossuary” might have been the missing eleventh ossuary wasn’t even worth debating.)

This could all be quite understandable and forgivable if Pellegrino was a noob in the murky realm of “Biblical archeology.” But he wasn’t. In fact, he credits himself as the co-discoverer of the city of Sodom.
He’s referring to a site in Iraq called Madhkanshapir, which he only partially excavated before the first Gulf War. Because it’s buried among oil fields, he surmises that earthquakes in the region allowed gas to escape where cooking fires could have ignited it. He points out that Moses saw the fires of Sodom/Gomhorra still smoldering three centuries later, and only an oil field could burn for so long.
In the bio on his website, Pellegrino explains that even though he calls himself the co-discoverer of Sodom, Madhkanshapir is probably just one of several destroyed cities that inspired the Biblical account.

So you might be noticing a pattern here. Pellegrino selects an historical artifact, connects it to a famous event that may or may not have even happened (or attaches himself to someone who has already made that connection), then promotes the hell out of it by writing a book and/or appearing in documentaries on the subject. This is an acceptable M.O. if you actually have persuasive evidence to back up your theory, but Pellegrino rarely (if ever) has the goods. Most of his books are minor masterpieces of speculation and conjecture.

Then there’s the problem of Pellegrino’s doctorate. Namely, he doesn’t have one. He isn’t a paleo-biologist with a degree from New Zealand’s Victoria University, as he has been claiming for almost 30 years. That doesn’t stop him from highlighting the “Dr.” on his website.
Pellegrino was a PhD candidate at Victoria U. in the ’70s, but his thesis was rejected and his ’86 appeal denied. When confronted with the fact that the university has no record of him being awarded a PhD, Pellegrino declared that it was revoked in the early ’80s because of a dispute over evolutionary theory. This “academic witch hunt” forced him to flee New Zealand after his lab was destroyed by vandals.
His thesis supervisor disputes this. Retired Victoria University professor Bob Wear stated, “I guess Pellegrino is very good at bullshit and he has managed to convince people of his authenticity throughout his life.” He describes Pellegrino as an intelligent but sloppy researcher prone to “weird tangents”.
Where does this leave his claims of being a multidisciplinary research scientist and engineer, designing everything from NASA life-detection systems to “the world’s first antimatter rocket”?

Then there’s the fact that The Last Train to Hiroshima isn’t the first of Pellegrino’s books to be withdrawn by its publisher. In 1990 Random House yanked Pellegrino’s Unearthing Atlantis from the presses after a Greek archaeologist challenged its content.

Now, back to that Hiroshima book. As mentioned, Pellegrino included the reminiscences of the late WWII vet Joseph Fuoco, who was assigned to the crew of one of the two surveillance planes that accompanied the Enola Gay on its date with destruction. He replaced flight engineer James Corliss at the last minute, because Corliss had fallen ill.
While the bomb was being loaded at an airbase on the Pacific island of Tinian, there was an accident in which an American scientist died. Fuoco pieced together what happened: Damage to the nuclear fuel assembly resulted in a deadly burst of radiation and reduced the bomb’s destructive power by more than half. Pellegrino repeatedly refers to Little Boy as “a dud.”

Almost as soon as The Last Train to Hiroshima appeared in print, the family of the late James Corliss stepped forward to refute Fuoco’s version of events. They say Corliss was in the surveillance plane, and all the evidence is on their side: Not only do the surviving crew members recall his presence, President Truman presented him with an air medal for his part in the operation.
Fuoco does not appear on the roster of the 509th Bomb Group. Ever.

At this point, it’s not clear who was behind the bogus story attributed to Fuoco. We only have Pellegrino’s word that Fuoco’s account came wholly from him, as the man died in 2008. His widow, Claire Fuoco, contends that he would not have invented such a story.

Nuclear scientists and historians had major problems with Fuoco’s story, too. The destructive potentials of Little Boy and Fat Man were fully realized; there is no evidence that either was damaged. Atomic historian Robert S. Norris stated that it is Pellegrino’s book, not the atomic bomb, that was defective. “This book is a Toyota,” he told the New York Times.

In February Pellegrino acknowledged his mistake in accepting Fuoco’s alleged version of events without researching it in any depth, and pledged to correct his errors for subsequent editions of the book. But the Fuoco story proved to be only part of the problem. Pellegrino was unable to satisfactorily answer questions about another of his sources, a Jesuit priest who claims one of his colleagues committed suicide. To date, there has been no confirmation that these two priests actually existed.

James Cameron, who last December accompanied Pellegrino on a visit to Tsutomu Yamaguchi, the last known survivor of both bombs in Hiroshima and Nagasaki, has referred to the criticism of Pellegrino’s work as “a misunderstanding”, insisting that Pellegrino would not fabricate anything.
It’s sad that Pellegrino’s fake credentials and poor research may scotch any Hiroshima film project Cameron had in the works, because as Greg Mitchell pointed out in a November editorial at The Huffington Post, the bombing of Japan is still something of a verbotin subject in America.

The outcry over Last Train has inspired the usual navel-gazing and excuse-spewing among editors, publisher reps, and literary agents. But given his track record, the most appalling aspect of the Hiroshima affair isn’t that Charles Pellegrino conducted shoddy research; it’s that anyone actually believed anything he had to say in the first place.

2009 Predictions: Pass or Fail?

Here are a few of the most interesting predictions for ’09, from some of the most trusted sources in the field of professional prognostication. How well did they do?

The aliens will introduce themselves on television. FAIL. On the July 10, 2009 broadcast of Coast to Coast AM, psychic David Wilcock announced that his inside sources within the intelligence community had told him that the U.S. government would give FULL DISCLOSURE about the alien presence on earth during a two-hour, international TV event by the end of the year. The TV spot had already been reserved and everything. During the broadcast, actual humanoid aliens would be trotted out and introduced to us by the President. Maybe the show was cancelled because too many viewers believe the President is an alien. Or because it would have cut into Leno’s time slot.
You can read about some of Wilcock’s other hilariously wrong predictions here.

The aliens won’t land, but the New World Order baddies will make us think they’ve landed, using holograms and high-tech gadgetry. FAIL. Throughout 2008, this prediction was touted by Alex Jones, Connie Fogal of the Canadian Action Party, and just about every conspiranoid on the planet. This video featuring Dr. Carol Rosin “explains” it.
The Japanese sea-monster hologram was sometimes cited as an example of how convincing a bogus alien invasion could be. Please. It’s cool, but even if you were really-really stoned, would you honestly think that was a live sea monster? Srsly? Would you run into a hotel lobby screaming, “There’s a sea monster in the bay and it looks pissed! Run away!”? Or would you say to yourself, “That’s an even better hologram than the shark in Back to the Future III! I am truly blessed to live in such a technologically advanced society, where otaku twentysomethings can create these wondrous marvels for the delight of mankind. Now I think I’ll hit the buffet”?

The Great Swine Flu Plot of ’09. FAIL. As I wrote at Leaving Alex Jonestown, Jones laid out the steps whereby the Commie-Satanist-Eugenicist elite would use forced H1N1 inoculation to cause rioting, giving them an excuse to bundle us all into FEMA camps and eliminate 80-99% of the world’s population. This was supposed to begin happening in the fall of ’09. Do I even have to mention that instead of forced inoculation programs, most developed countries have major overstocks of H1N1 vaccine?
I didn’t think so.

The Web Bot Project “Global Coastal Event”. UNDETERMINED. According to the Web Bots, early 2009 was supposed to see a “Global Coastal Event” and a lot of other vague-ass stuff like “emotional intensity”.

Sylvia Browne’s Predictions. Here’s what the dagger-nailed doyenne of epic fail predicted for ’09:

– The economy will rebound around May. FAIL.
– The U.S. will discover even more oil and gas reserves and begin using its own resources. FAIL.
– Regulation of loans and stocks will increase. FAIL.
– More jobs with better benefits (better than what?) will appear mid-year. FAIL.

– Troops will begin coming home from Iraq en masse in December. FAIL.
– Tsunamis and earthquakes will occur in the Far East. PASS.
– Branjelina will probably break up towards the end of the year. PASS? FAIL? WHO CARES?
– Harrison Ford will have a health scare. FAIL.
– Clint Eastwood will have varicose veins. UNDETERMINED, and who cares?
– Robert Redford will be honored for an award-winning documentary. FAIL. Not only did Redford not direct or produce a documentary, he wasn’t honored much at all in ’09. In fact, Lions for Lambs made most critics and fans want to kick his ass. A better prediction would have been, “It’s finally going to suck to be Robert Redford this year.”
– Katie Couric will leave CBS Nightly News. FAIL.
– Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins will start a large alternative-energy organization. That sounds like a safe bet, but FAIL.
– In March, a large liner “will go aground, sending many people into the water”. FAIL.
– Two plane crashes near the East Coast in August and September. FAIL. And she didn’t see the Hudson crash in January. That’s an extra FAIL.
– Terrorist attack close to Paris in January. FAIL.
– Two attacks in India in February. FAIL.
– A Brinks trunk will be robbed in Vegas. FAIL. Try Florida.
– An uprising will occur in Oakland, California – something to do with a police officer and gang members. PASS. There were riots after the shooting of Oscar Grant III in January ’09.