The World’s Weirdest/Stupidest Conspiracy Theories

(in no particular order, with each theory’s author or main proponent in parentheses, if known)

  • The driver shot JFK. (the late William Cooper)
  • The Beatles were designed and sent to the U.S. by the British Psychological Warfare Division, to undermine the morals of American teenagers. (Lyndon LaRouche)
  • Christ’s Crucifixion was staged. (Hugh Schonfield) Christ eloped with Mary Magdalene, and one or both of them fled to France to raise their family. (Baigent/Leigh/Lincoln)
  • Christ and his disciples were a magic-mushroom cult. (Dead Sea Scrolls scholar John Allegro)
  • HIV/AIDS was created in a lab.
  • HIV does not cause AIDS.
  • Man never landed on the moon. It’s not even possible. But there is an alien base there. (see Wikipedia; for an artful and very funny parody of how these theories can be patched together from unrelated material, watch the mockumentary Dark Side of the Moon)
  • The Zapruder film is entirely fake, even though it contradicts the findings of the Warren Commission. (Jim Fetzer)
  • Stephen King killed John Lennon. (Steve Lightfoot)
  • WWII was staged. It never really happened. The Illuminati employed elaborate special effects, stage magic, and phony journalism to scare the world into pacifism. (Donald Holmes)
  • Queen Elizabeth I was a man. The real Elizabeth died as a child.
  • George H.W. Bush was really George Scherff Sr., a Nazi sent to destroy America as a teenager and adopted by Prescott Bush (Scherff was also an assistant to Nikola Tesla, and stole all Tesla’s inventions after he was murdered by Otto Skorzeny and Reinhard Gehlen). Hitler was still alive in Montana in 1997, and Josef Mengele is keeping himself alive and youthful with a regimen of hormones and cannibalism. Oh, and Curious George was inspired by a young George Scherff Jr.; that’s probably why Alan J. Shalleck was murdered by two men he met through a gay sex network one day before the movie premiered. (this information comes from a man named Eric Berman, who claims he heard it straight from his girlfriend’s dad, Otto Skorzeny, in Florida during the late ’90s. Skorzeny died in Madrid in 1975.)
  • One promoter of the Scherff-Bush story adds that Josef Mengele was the real Zodiac, the Boston Strangler(s), and the anthrax letter mailer. (http://www.thebushconnection.com/)
  • The 1939 War of the Worlds radio broadcoast was a psychological warfare study funded by C.D. Jackson on behalf of the Rockefeller Foundation, designed to find out how Americans would react to an enemy invasion. Funny… in a trailer for his mockumentary F is for Fake, Orson Welles did say the WoW broadcast had “secret sponsors”. (Daniel Hopsicker)
  • A really old one that just won’t die: Jews drink the blood and eat the flesh of Gentile children during Passover. Some Catholics still revere the relics of Medieval child saints supposedly slaughtered and devoured by Jews.
  • The doomed Franklin Expedition was sent to the Arctic not only to find the Northwest Passage, but to secretly investigate UFO sightings that had been reported since the 1700s. The men were captured, experimented upon, and eaten by giant aliens. (Jeffrey Blair Latta)
  • Hitler and some associates escaped to the Arctic in a submarine, to live with super-advanced aliens who reside within the hollow earth. (This story originated with Edward Bulwer-Lytton’s novel The Coming Race, was treated as fact by the pre-Nazi Vril Society, was bolstered by the forged “secret diary” of Admiral Byrd, and was adopted by the likes of Ernst Zundel)
  • Denver International Airport was built expressly to conceal a vast underground complex, headquarters of the New World Order elite. Clues are hidden in the airport’s peace-themed mural.
  • Scientology: Billions of years ago the intergalactic overlord Xenu used a film to brainwash our souls (“Thetans”) into believing in the world’s major religions, which he invented.
  • Gnosticism: The entire material world is an evil trap created by the imposter God of the Bible.
  • Nation of Islam: White people were created in a lab.
  • Jesuits sank the Titanic to kill some of the world’s richest, most powerful Jews.
  • The early Middle Ages (614-911 A.D.) never occurred. Everything that supposedly happened during those years was either a misunderstanding, an event from a different era, or an outright lie – Charlemagne, for instance, is a fictional figure. And we are actually living in the 1700s. (Herbert Illig’s phantom time hypothesis)
  • Shortly before he left office, Bill Clinton secretly signed into law the National Economic Security and Reformation Act (NESARA). This act would have completely restructured the U.S. government by – among other things – forgiving all personal credit card debt and mortgages, abolishing the IRS, restoring constitutional law, and somehow ensuring world peace – but the Supreme Court placed a gag order on it, and threatened death to any government official who breathed word of its existence. NESARA activists around the world are agitating to get the act announced and instituted.
  • Aspartame, flouride, genetically modified foods, and vaccines are used specifically to keep us sick and open to suggestion, and/or as part of a secret depopulation plan designed by the world’s elite.
  • Atlanta child murder theories: Victims were used for CDC research into Interferon; KKK Klansmen posed as cops to wipe out young black men (Dick Gregory); white scientists needed the boys’ foreskins to produce a cure for cancer and/or a youth serum. (Dick Gregory again)
  • Jeffrey Dahmer was an actor hired by the Ambrosia Chocolate company to pose as a cannibal killer so no one would object to the factory being torn down and another one built with illegal tax breaks (posted by “manoftruth” on online forums devoted to Rush and Bon Jovi, along with rants on Wicca and Jews; his name might be Mark Zahn, but who knows?).

And here’s a fun one: By combining two separate conspiracy theories, you can turn Hitler into Jack the Ripper!
Theory #1: Prince Eddy, Duke of Clarence, faked his death to move to Germany and become Adolph Hitler.
Theory #2: Prince Eddy, Duke of Clarence (and/or Freemasons acting on his behalf) was Jack the Ripper.
Hence, Prince Eddy might have killed several prostitues, faked his own death, then resurfaced in Austria as Hitler.

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227 thoughts on “The World’s Weirdest/Stupidest Conspiracy Theories

  1. Schonfield does not say Jesus 'staged' his death as much as that he acted out what was expected of the Messiah and really was crucified. Whether he actually died or not in six hours of crucifixion when sometimes death took six days is a different question.9-11. Ever heard of a Primus stove? boils kerosene to burn the pressurized vapor far hotter than the liquid will burn. Take full aerokerosene tanks , eject burning and boiling down shafts until it hits the bottom and you have a bomb, not a fire. Maybe there were bombs as well. Is it beyond the ability of an organization capable of hijacking aircraft to also plant a few strategic bombs? They had tried before and been caught.

  2. Here are some of the wildest rumours yet.—These are about 9-11:Identified Hijackers on flight 11:Ronald McDonald,Grimace,Mayor McCheese,Hamburglar,and the Fry Guys.On Flight 175:Burger Chef and Jeff,The Pillsbury Doughboy and Mrs.Butterworth.Flight 77:Count Chocula,BooBerry,FrankenBerry,and the Hamburger Helper Oven-Mitt.Flight 93: Spuds MacKenzie,Alex from Stroh's,Dinky from Taco Bell and the Ghost of the Mechanical Shark from Jaws(code-named Bruce).

  3. It's amazing how quick all the truthers come out of the woodwork making the same discredited points. They latch on to thermite and some other claims by one former BYU professor and a movie, and think that science is on their side.

  4. When Blow-Pops came out with Blueberry flavor, some friends of mine refused to eat that flavor. They felt that the kkk made the flavor to kill black people with cancerous food coloring, just that one flavor. Silly, huh?Facts are established through scientific observations. Belief is a product of faith. Insanity is the process of arguing one's belief with facts. The best way to win at tic-tac-toe is not to play. Natural evolution is eternal war. The ultimate desire of civilized mankind is to exist outside of evolution, or nature, and to control our own destiny. We want to be greater than dinosaurs. We will be forced to adapt greatly to achieve this, perhaps there is not enough room on this earth alone for our egos, but we can not turn backward to beasts. The path would be easier to return to nature, but we have gone beyond that now, we know too much. Intelligence is learning all the secrets of the universe while retaining membership status in its existence.

  5. best conspiracy ever: the illuminati created a robot jesus to start christianity and traded the real jesus with aliens from the moon so they could get nukes to start WWII and then brainwashed muslims into creating the usa so that they could still rule the world after 9/11 cuz that's when the robot terrorist aliens from space bombed the pentagon and killed jfk

  6. It's easy to say that immense force of planes + fire temps brought down the buildings.1.) The buildings were made to withstand a jets impact.2.) Jet fuel burned the building down? You really think the expert engineers who constructed the fucking building to take the plane hit, wouldn't take into consideration that the planes would have explosive fuel in them? UHH, LETS BUILD THIS BUILDING TO STAND A JET, BUT, BUT, ONLY JETS WITHOUT FUEL IN THEM! Fucking derk da DERK! YOU saw those buildings stand for a couple hours respectively. The first tower came down, into itself.The second tower.. Came down into itself..The THIRD building.. CAME DOWN INTO ITSELF..OMG the INSANITY of you "realists".. NO FUCKING WONDER we are in trillions of dollars in debt! YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU KNOW IT ALL!Don't forget how the owner of the World Trade Centers insured his building from terrorist attack, months before the attack.But that's just mere coincidence.

  7. wow. lastly, I discovered something helpful for my paper to put in writing about. this is attention-grabbing and helps me with more research within the future. Glad I discovered this blog.Thank you. And I do hope you'll develop a few of your ideas about this subject and I will certain come again and read it. Thanks for the effort and time.

  8. When I originally commented I clicked the “Notify me when new feedback are added” checkbox and now every time a remark is added I get four emails kidney stones treatment with the identical comment. Is there any approach you possibly can take away me from that service? Thanks

  9. This is the greatest thing I've ever read. All the people going "lol these conspricacies are so retarded but 9/11 isnt!!!111111111 also, the moon landing was fake and the illuminati have a secret orbitting moon base with laser and teh sercrets to eternal life."So keep screaming at those who have been brainwashed you nut jobs, then believe what Joe nobody has to say about shit he knows nothing about. the world is more alert then you know. But keep it up, I love the contradiction.

  10. You forgot:Saddam Hussein and Al Queda were co-conspirators….oh wait, I forgot, most of the knuckleheads that read National Review still believe that tripe….man you people are stupid

  11. As someone who holds interest, but generally no belief in conspiracy theories, I liked this as soon as I found it, but you truly won my heart twelve bullets down. I will sooooo be keeping up with this blog!

  12. About the HIV thing: if HIV cannot be found in a significant number of people with AIDS, then what proves that HIV causes AIDS? I mean, I can understand a small discrepancy, but when more than, say, 5% of an infected population don't carry the virus that supposedly causes the infection, that calls for some doubt.Apart from that…yeah, most of these are pretty stupid.

  13. The movie "The Blair Witch Project" was created by the government and distributed by the CIA to scare people away from entering preserved forests where the government secretly has death camps, human experiment facilities, alien research facilities, biological warfare testing, soviet missile research and major psychological warfare tests not only for war but for its own people.

  14. Once heard about the denver airport, cause those murals are fuckin CREEPY!! And the things that says ag on the floor in front of a mural also stands for the austrailian antagen that supposedly will kill most of the population.

  15. Info Wars has destroyed my family and alienated our friends. Why don't the Info Wars believers see that Alex Jones and his crew are PROFITING from the fear and paranoia they promote !? No fear; no profits on all the IGNORANCE they sell in the way of videos, books, products, etc.

  16. Jimmy J farmeth is a good 10 year old boy everliving flesh non robot. negress want a time portal to erase his genetics from hister y all kinds of beam weoponsd a poltergiest that could kill 9 people 9 people, some kind of raybeam that makes everyhting thousends below farenhite temp used on his matreess white boys are life force not scum. they amade hundred of holograms in his path of strength bot the home and school where he was at to leave his essense without a breath oxy gen breathers like jimmy J are life forcehe only had 5 minute dreams of floating every seven hours eyes closed, everything in this hounting is speedid up so 5 seconds is 20 minutes including the tv and radio

  17. Doweenkies have taken over S, Calif. Puffy waffy’s must be dispatched “forth with” ….. Ownllyy they can pr0tect the Logical’s from a fate werser then bowing bowing …..yep!

  18. I see swallowingthecamel.me is outranked by many competitors in google’s search results. You should use links pyramid strategy in order to rank your site. I outsource this time consuming task and focus on my content and have great results. You should try this too, for more info just search in google – Burol’s Tips Outsource The Work

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